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Airport Security Quotes

I want to be a Bond girl. Think about it - I have metal components in my legs, so when I go through airport security, I set off the alarms. But when they realize why I’m beeping, they let me through. What if I had weapons in my legs? I could take one off and pull out an Uzi! Legs Galore - that would be me! Picture Quote #1

I had more material on weather than anyone else, I guess, ... back when I was traveling a lot on the road as a standup comic, between airport security and the weather... I just wanted to be prepared for sitting in the airport Picture Quote #1

If you want something bad enough, you’ve got to make a bold move. George Washington, took on the British Empire. Neil Armstrong walked on the moon. Ken Titus taped a hotel key to his underwear to score with an airport security guard Picture Quote #1

The events of September 11 would have been impossible if there were no airport security system at all. If average Americans were allowed to carry their personal firearms on board our aircraft ..., the chances that several passengers on each flight would have been armed-and thus able to shoot the hijackers, preventing the Trade Center and Pentagon hits-would have been quite substantial Picture Quote #1

I’d like to fly. Then I wouldn’t have to wait in airport security lines Picture Quote #1

A witticism in an airport security line is like a Swiss tap - turn it on, and you instantly find yourself in hot water Picture Quote #1

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Sometimes airport security people recognize me. I’ll go through the whole screening process and at the end they’ll go, ‘Hey, man, I really like your work.’ That’s so cool Picture Quote #1

When we were scared about 9/11, we federalized the airport security, we spent millions for body armor for dogs in Ohio. All that over-reaction comes from fear and government - bad combination Picture Quote #1

I’ve done so many Lifetime movies; at this point, I’ll be going through airport security, and the lady there will be like, ‘I took the weekend off and I saw four of your movies.’ And I say: ‘You’ve been watching Lifetime, right?’ Picture Quote #1

Shamu and I have arrived safely in Costa Rica. He was stopped by airport security because he carries enough artillery in his pants pockets to construct a sawed-off shotgun. Evidently, he though we were headed to Iraq Picture Quote #1

At the departure gate, a drunken airport security woman was handing out box cutters to the passengers Picture Quote #1

I hate flying, airports and the whole rigmarole - queuing up, security and lost luggage Picture Quote #1

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When the Transportation Security Administration adopted body scanners at airports, activists wrote the Fourth Amendment on their underwear in metallic paint readable by the new devices Picture Quote #1

Airport security is a particular bugbear. At the risk of sounding like a grumpy old man, while I can see that averting terrorism is manifestly important, the measures taken seem, simultaneously, absurd Picture Quote #1

I always thought security was a joke at New York airports, and in U.S. airports to begin with. You can go through any European or Middle Eastern airport and things are a lot tougher Picture Quote #1

Why do we go through all the nonsense with security at our airport? It’s not because the Catholic Church is falling apart Picture Quote #1

The front line with ISIS isn’t just in Iraq and Syria, it’s in Kennedy Airport and the Rio Grande. Border security is national security Picture Quote #1

Six imams removed from a US Airways flight from Minneapolis to Phoenix are calling on Muslims to boycott the airline. If only we could get Muslims to boycott all airlines, we could dispense with airport security altogether Picture Quote #1

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We put people of concern on the watch list or the no-fly list, so we have a number of layers of security beyond the airport checkpoint. We gather as much information about a passenger as the law allows without profiling Picture Quote #1

After Lockerbie, everyone thought, now we’ve learned the lesson of how to be proactive instead of being reactive. Unfortunately, September 11 came and we know the result. Thousands of people lost their lives. Security totally failed, not at one airport, at three different airports around the country Picture Quote #1

We boarded the plane after boxing our stakes and knives and taking them to a FedEx carrier, airport security being so strict nowadays. In the section marked ‘contents’, Bones filled out ‘Tofu’. God, but he had a sick sense of humor sometimes Picture Quote #1

Gough never pretended to perfection or to sainthood - well, hardly ever. Although when he set off the metal detector at airport security, he would blame his aura Picture Quote #1

The federal government said today they’ve begun training sessions for airport security workers to provide what they call more customer satisfaction to the travels, they want to make it easier for us. They’re instructing security guards to glance at your luggage tags so that they can call you by your first name. Isn’t that creepy? The guy touching your wife, calling her by her first name Picture Quote #1

I flew this past weekend. I went through airport security and said to the guy, ‘Is everything okay?’ He said, ‘You might want to have that mole on your ass checked out.’ That seems a little personal to me Picture Quote #1

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I believe the public’s confidence would be increased if the federal government took over the functions of airport security screening for all passengers Picture Quote #1

It was either me or Confucius that said the journey of a thousand miles begins with a vicious ass raping at airport security Picture Quote #1

There were precisely two groups of people who desperately wanted airport security to be browbeaten into giving suspicious passengers a pass: terrorists and Democrats Picture Quote #1

Airport security exists to guard us against terrorist attacks Picture Quote #1

I seethe at the humiliation of airport security checks Picture Quote #1

To tell you the truth, man, we spend most of the time travelling in hotels, in festivals, in concert halls, clubs, airports. The most unenjoyable part is all the security at airports Picture Quote #1

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Text Quotes

I want to be a Bond girl. Think about it - I have metal components in my legs, so when I go through airport security, I set off the alarms. But when they realize why I’m beeping, they let me through. What if I had weapons in my legs? I could take one off and pull out an Uzi! Legs Galore - that would be me! (Airport Security Quotes) I had more material on weather than anyone else, I guess, ... back when I was traveling a lot on the road as a standup comic, between airport security and the weather... I just wanted to be prepared for sitting in the airport. (Airport Security Quotes) If you want something bad enough, you’ve got to make a bold move. George Washington, took on the British Empire. Neil Armstrong walked on the moon. Ken Titus taped a hotel key to his underwear to score with an airport security guard. (Airport Security Quotes) The events of September 11 would have been impossible if there were no airport security system at all. If average Americans were allowed to carry their personal firearms on board our aircraft ..., the chances that several passengers on each flight would have been armed-and thus able to shoot the hijackers, preventing the Trade Center and Pentagon hits-would have been quite substantial. (Airport Security Quotes) I’d like to fly. Then I wouldn’t have to wait in airport security lines. (Airport Security Quotes) A witticism in an airport security line is like a Swiss tap - turn it on, and you instantly find yourself in hot water. (Airport Security Quotes) Sometimes airport security people recognize me. I’ll go through the whole screening process and at the end they’ll go, ‘Hey, man, I really like your work.’ That’s so cool. (Airport Security Quotes) When we were scared about 9/11, we federalized the airport security, we spent millions for body armor for dogs in Ohio. All that over-reaction comes from fear and government - bad combination. (Airport Security Quotes) I’ve done so many Lifetime movies; at this point, I’ll be going through airport security, and the lady there will be like, ‘I took the weekend off and I saw four of your movies.’ And I say: ‘You’ve been watching Lifetime, right?’ (Airport Security Quotes) Shamu and I have arrived safely in Costa Rica. He was stopped by airport security because he carries enough artillery in his pants pockets to construct a sawed-off shotgun. Evidently, he though we were headed to Iraq. (Airport Security Quotes) At the departure gate, a drunken airport security woman was handing out box cutters to the passengers. (Airport Security Quotes) I hate flying, airports and the whole rigmarole - queuing up, security and lost luggage (Airport Security Quotes) When the Transportation Security Administration adopted body scanners at airports, activists wrote the Fourth Amendment on their underwear in metallic paint readable by the new devices. (Airport Security Quotes) Airport security is a particular bugbear. At the risk of sounding like a grumpy old man, while I can see that averting terrorism is manifestly important, the measures taken seem, simultaneously, absurd. (Airport Security Quotes) I always thought security was a joke at New York airports, and in U.S. airports to begin with. You can go through any European or Middle Eastern airport and things are a lot tougher. (Airport Security Quotes) Why do we go through all the nonsense with security at our airport? It’s not because the Catholic Church is falling apart. (Airport Security Quotes) The front line with ISIS isn’t just in Iraq and Syria, it’s in Kennedy Airport and the Rio Grande. Border security is national security. (Airport Security Quotes) Six imams removed from a US Airways flight from Minneapolis to Phoenix are calling on Muslims to boycott the airline. If only we could get Muslims to boycott all airlines, we could dispense with airport security altogether. (Airport Security Quotes) We put people of concern on the watch list or the no-fly list, so we have a number of layers of security beyond the airport checkpoint. We gather as much information about a passenger as the law allows without profiling (Airport Security Quotes) After Lockerbie, everyone thought, now we’ve learned the lesson of how to be proactive instead of being reactive. Unfortunately, September 11 came and we know the result. Thousands of people lost their lives. Security totally failed, not at one airport, at three different airports around the country (Airport Security Quotes) We boarded the plane after boxing our stakes and knives and taking them to a FedEx carrier, airport security being so strict nowadays. In the section marked ‘contents’, Bones filled out ‘Tofu’. God, but he had a sick sense of humor sometimes (Airport Security Quotes) Gough never pretended to perfection or to sainthood - well, hardly ever. Although when he set off the metal detector at airport security, he would blame his aura (Airport Security Quotes) The federal government said today they’ve begun training sessions for airport security workers to provide what they call more customer satisfaction to the travels, they want to make it easier for us. They’re instructing security guards to glance at your luggage tags so that they can call you by your first name. Isn’t that creepy? The guy touching your wife, calling her by her first name (Airport Security Quotes) I flew this past weekend. I went through airport security and said to the guy, ‘Is everything okay?’ He said, ‘You might want to have that mole on your ass checked out.’ That seems a little personal to me (Airport Security Quotes) I believe the public’s confidence would be increased if the federal government took over the functions of airport security screening for all passengers. (Airport Security Quotes) It was either me or Confucius that said the journey of a thousand miles begins with a vicious ass raping at airport security. (Airport Security Quotes) There were precisely two groups of people who desperately wanted airport security to be browbeaten into giving suspicious passengers a pass: terrorists and Democrats. (Airport Security Quotes) Airport security exists to guard us against terrorist attacks (Airport Security Quotes) I seethe at the humiliation of airport security checks (Airport Security Quotes) To tell you the truth, man, we spend most of the time travelling in hotels, in festivals, in concert halls, clubs, airports. The most unenjoyable part is all the security at airports (Airport Security Quotes)

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