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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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A statesman who shakes the fruit trees of his neighbors - to dislodge the worms (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
MONAD, n. The ultimate, indivisible unit of matter (see Molecule). The monad has body without bulk, and mind without manifestation - containing all the powers and possibilities needful to his evolution into a German philosopher . . (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Anoint, v.: To grease a king or other great functionary already sufficiently slippery. (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
There’s no free will, says the philosopher; To hang is most unjust. There is no free will, assents the officer; We hang because we must. (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Patience: A minor form of despair disguised as a virtue (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Responsibility, n. A detachable burden easily shifted to the shoulders of God, fate, fortune, luck or one's neighbor. In the days of astrology it was customary to unload it upon a star (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Bore, n. A person who talks when you wish him to listen (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit without individual responsibility (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Day: A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Reconsider, v. To seek a justification for a decision already made (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Dawn: When men of reason go to bed (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Alliance - in international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other's pockets that they cannot separately plunder a third (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Childhood: the period of human life intermediate between the idiocy of infancy and the folly of youth - two removes from the sin of manhood and three from the remorse of age (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Experience - the wisdom that enables us to recognise in an undesirable old acquaintance the folly that we have already embraced (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Forgetfulness - a gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscience (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Beauty, n: the power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Day, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Happiness: an agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of another (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Irreligion - the principal one of the great faiths of the world (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Learning, n. The kind of ignorance distinguishing the studious (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Mad, adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Photograph: a picture painted by the sun without instruction in art (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)
Revolution, n. In politics, an abrupt change in the form of misgovernment (Ambrose Bierce Quotes)