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Comedy Quotes

Of course the chronology of the books is a bit back- to - front, and books usually come out before movies. But happily, these [Bridget Jones’s] are fictional comedy diaries - not a history of the Battle of Waterloo Picture Quote #1

Over the years, I managed to develop this comedy career, went from opening act to headliner at comedy clubs, to playing concert halls, and had an off-Broadway show with ‘Sleepwalk With Me.’ Picture Quote #1

I did six Broadway shows, and I noticed there weren’t many female comedians. When I went to a dancing audition, there were 1,000 girls. And there were three jobs. So I said I’ll just try comedy. And I loved it Picture Quote #1

In my new IFC comedy game show, ‘Bunk,’ we actually use our intern Patrick as a human timer - giving contestants the time it takes for him to wade through a bag of broken glass for a razor blade, to get gum out of his hair, to pick up every strand from a box of spaghetti I spill on the floor, etc, etc Picture Quote #1

My brothers and sister and me grew up making fun of each other, the way we’d speak or move. When we get together, everyone’s funny, quick, loud, and speaks on top of each other. It was like a great comedy school; nothing is precious Picture Quote #1

I always find it actually funny that the analysis is that the characters I play in comedies are the manchild, the adolescent, characters that refuse to grow up. And yet, if you look back in the history of comedy all the way back to the Marx brothers, that’s a big part of comedy Picture Quote #1

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There’s always something interesting about comedy teams that have the exact same energy. The one time I really noticed that was Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly in ‘Step Brothers.’ Picture Quote #1

You don’t really have to say much when your headline is ‘Drag Queen Robs Burger King.’ Sometimes comedy writes itself Picture Quote #1

By the time I finished comedy, I was really burnt out of it. I had had enough. I don’t really have a strong desire to prove myself in that area, or to go back to it in any great way Picture Quote #1

The economics favour one-man comedy shows: all you need is one person, a microphone and a PA system. But I’m pleased so many people are making a living out of comedy - it’s a wonderful business to be in Picture Quote #1

Comedy is a very lucrative business now, but when everyone first went into it, it didn’t make sense from a financial standpoint Picture Quote #1

I’ve been driving in the city for years because, as a stand-up in N.Y.C., you can perform at more comedy clubs a night if you have a car. Getting from club to club by subway is too slow at night and too expensive by cab. So, many comics live far out from Manhattan and drive in every night Picture Quote #1

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You can tell a lot about a man from his hands. If they don’t have any scars or calluses on them, you might as well assume they cry at romantic comedy films, too Picture Quote #1

Obviously, my stuff has been more in the comedy realm, and I really believe that if I’m laughing behind the camera, then I think the film will be funnier Picture Quote #1

If you decide to do comedy that involves risk, risk means risk, and you can’t complain of flesh wounds if you sit down at the table to play Picture Quote #1

Executives do not on the whole do well with comedy. They can’t understand it, they can’t read it, they can’t spot it Picture Quote #1

Anders Thomas Jensen and I had talked about making a movie which addressed the cancer issue, and we didn’t want to make it heavy-handed. We wanted to do something which had a lot of hope in it. And then for some reason we came up with a romantic comedy Picture Quote #1

A lot of female comedians will go up there in a sweatshirt and Converses, trying to dress themselves down, because it is sort of a boy’s club. I’ll go up in my heels. I like that people don’t think I’ll be funny. I’ll take that on. I don’t do standup comedy - I do standup and I do comedy, but I don’t go up there and do jokes Picture Quote #1

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You can take lessons to become almost anything: flying lessons, piano lessons, skydiving lessons, acting lessons, race car driving lessons, singing lessons. But there’s no class for comedy. You have to be born with it. God has to give you this gift Picture Quote #1

You can find pictures anywhere. It’s simply a matter of noticing things and organizing them. You just have to care about what’s around you and have a concern with humanity and the human comedy Picture Quote #1

I’m a ‘Bridesmaids’ type of girl. I love silliness. That’s who I am at heart, and I know I can do it. If my career path takes me elsewhere, that’s great. But comedy is my forte Picture Quote #1

Instead of going into politics, I decided to go into comedy, which is the second most daunting career path for a woman Picture Quote #1

I moved from acting to stand-up because castings are just about what you look like. It doesn’t matter if you can act or not. In comedy, no one cares what you look like Picture Quote #1

I was in love with a lot of people, because I was a student of the game of comedy - Carol Burnett, Jack Benny, Red Skelton, Jackie Gleason, Don Rickles, Red Foxx, Moms Mabley - who gets no credit, Richard Pryor, Bill Cosby, George Kirby. I loved them all, and I used to just take a page out of all of them Picture Quote #1

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But comedy is like music, it appeals to some people. Some people like Creed, those people are usually pretty stupid. But they probably also like Carrot Top. I would say that they’re part of the same ilk Picture Quote #1

What they call ‘alt-comedy’ now is basically what comedy was like in the 80s. People tried different things, and everybody went to the clubs; there was no other place. Then somehow, the clubs became infiltrated by Dice Clay and Carrot Top types Picture Quote #1

I have spiritual beliefs that I could literally go out and make an entire comedy routine about, and tour as some sort of spiritual guru, but it kind of goes against that [as] I actually believe the things, so I’m always kind of caught in the middle Picture Quote #1

People don’t understand that that’s really what it is. They’re looking for a magic phone number or something. And to a certain extent, I understand that, because comedy is treated so much as a stepping stone by a lot of people Picture Quote #1

Stand-up comedy in the end, unlike the rest of the entertainment industry, is a meritocracy. There’s a certain level of undeniability you can work toward Picture Quote #1

Whether it’s corporate investigations or comedy, there are certain inherent truths to trying to get what you want while trying to be a decent person doing it Picture Quote #1

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Friendship Quotes

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Text Quotes

Of course the chronology of the books is a bit back- to - front, and books usually come out before movies. But happily, these [Bridget Jones’s] are fictional comedy diaries - not a history of the Battle of Waterloo. (Comedy Quotes) Over the years, I managed to develop this comedy career, went from opening act to headliner at comedy clubs, to playing concert halls, and had an off-Broadway show with ‘Sleepwalk With Me.’ (Comedy Quotes) I did six Broadway shows, and I noticed there weren’t many female comedians. When I went to a dancing audition, there were 1,000 girls. And there were three jobs. So I said I’ll just try comedy. And I loved it. (Comedy Quotes) In my new IFC comedy game show, ‘Bunk,’ we actually use our intern Patrick as a human timer - giving contestants the time it takes for him to wade through a bag of broken glass for a razor blade, to get gum out of his hair, to pick up every strand from a box of spaghetti I spill on the floor, etc, etc. (Comedy Quotes) My brothers and sister and me grew up making fun of each other, the way we’d speak or move. When we get together, everyone’s funny, quick, loud, and speaks on top of each other. It was like a great comedy school; nothing is precious. (Comedy Quotes) I always find it actually funny that the analysis is that the characters I play in comedies are the manchild, the adolescent, characters that refuse to grow up. And yet, if you look back in the history of comedy all the way back to the Marx brothers, that’s a big part of comedy. (Comedy Quotes) There’s always something interesting about comedy teams that have the exact same energy. The one time I really noticed that was Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly in ‘Step Brothers.’ (Comedy Quotes) You don’t really have to say much when your headline is ‘Drag Queen Robs Burger King.’ Sometimes comedy writes itself. (Comedy Quotes) By the time I finished comedy, I was really burnt out of it. I had had enough. I don’t really have a strong desire to prove myself in that area, or to go back to it in any great way. (Comedy Quotes) The economics favour one-man comedy shows: all you need is one person, a microphone and a PA system. But I’m pleased so many people are making a living out of comedy - it’s a wonderful business to be in. (Comedy Quotes) Comedy is a very lucrative business now, but when everyone first went into it, it didn’t make sense from a financial standpoint. (Comedy Quotes) I’ve been driving in the city for years because, as a stand-up in N.Y.C., you can perform at more comedy clubs a night if you have a car. Getting from club to club by subway is too slow at night and too expensive by cab. So, many comics live far out from Manhattan and drive in every night. (Comedy Quotes) You can tell a lot about a man from his hands. If they don’t have any scars or calluses on them, you might as well assume they cry at romantic comedy films, too. (Comedy Quotes) Obviously, my stuff has been more in the comedy realm, and I really believe that if I’m laughing behind the camera, then I think the film will be funnier. (Comedy Quotes) If you decide to do comedy that involves risk, risk means risk, and you can’t complain of flesh wounds if you sit down at the table to play. (Comedy Quotes) Executives do not on the whole do well with comedy. They can’t understand it, they can’t read it, they can’t spot it. (Comedy Quotes) Anders Thomas Jensen and I had talked about making a movie which addressed the cancer issue, and we didn’t want to make it heavy-handed. We wanted to do something which had a lot of hope in it. And then for some reason we came up with a romantic comedy. (Comedy Quotes) A lot of female comedians will go up there in a sweatshirt and Converses, trying to dress themselves down, because it is sort of a boy’s club. I’ll go up in my heels. I like that people don’t think I’ll be funny. I’ll take that on. I don’t do standup comedy - I do standup and I do comedy, but I don’t go up there and do jokes. (Comedy Quotes) You can take lessons to become almost anything: flying lessons, piano lessons, skydiving lessons, acting lessons, race car driving lessons, singing lessons. But there’s no class for comedy. You have to be born with it. God has to give you this gift. (Comedy Quotes) You can find pictures anywhere. It’s simply a matter of noticing things and organizing them. You just have to care about what’s around you and have a concern with humanity and the human comedy. (Comedy Quotes) I’m a ‘Bridesmaids’ type of girl. I love silliness. That’s who I am at heart, and I know I can do it. If my career path takes me elsewhere, that’s great. But comedy is my forte. (Comedy Quotes) Instead of going into politics, I decided to go into comedy, which is the second most daunting career path for a woman. (Comedy Quotes) I moved from acting to stand-up because castings are just about what you look like. It doesn’t matter if you can act or not. In comedy, no one cares what you look like. (Comedy Quotes) I was in love with a lot of people, because I was a student of the game of comedy - Carol Burnett, Jack Benny, Red Skelton, Jackie Gleason, Don Rickles, Red Foxx, Moms Mabley - who gets no credit, Richard Pryor, Bill Cosby, George Kirby. I loved them all, and I used to just take a page out of all of them. (Comedy Quotes) But comedy is like music, it appeals to some people. Some people like Creed, those people are usually pretty stupid. But they probably also like Carrot Top. I would say that they’re part of the same ilk. (Comedy Quotes) What they call ‘alt-comedy’ now is basically what comedy was like in the 80s. People tried different things, and everybody went to the clubs; there was no other place. Then somehow, the clubs became infiltrated by Dice Clay and Carrot Top types. (Comedy Quotes) I have spiritual beliefs that I could literally go out and make an entire comedy routine about, and tour as some sort of spiritual guru, but it kind of goes against that [as] I actually believe the things, so I’m always kind of caught in the middle. (Comedy Quotes) People don’t understand that that’s really what it is. They’re looking for a magic phone number or something. And to a certain extent, I understand that, because comedy is treated so much as a stepping stone by a lot of people. (Comedy Quotes) Stand-up comedy in the end, unlike the rest of the entertainment industry, is a meritocracy. There’s a certain level of undeniability you can work toward. (Comedy Quotes) Whether it’s corporate investigations or comedy, there are certain inherent truths to trying to get what you want while trying to be a decent person doing it. (Comedy Quotes)

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