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Craig Ferguson Quotes

I said that the only way I could have a band that would work in the format of my show is if the band were crap. So if I have a band they’d have to really suck Picture Quote #1

I think holidays create so much pressure because people feel they should be having a good time. But you shouldn’t Picture Quote #1

I have no ambitions beyond being comfortable in what I do for a living - and earning a living Picture Quote #1

I realized women and humor were linked very closely Picture Quote #1

If Scotland and America go to war, I'm afraid I've already sworn in Picture Quote #1

I have to do a show which is of interest to me, or else I’m lost Picture Quote #1

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Other than the laws of physics, rules have never really worked out for me Picture Quote #1

I didn’t say no because between safety and adventure I choose adventure Picture Quote #1

Much of television has been homogenized in the desire to avoid annoying or upsetting people Picture Quote #1

Old people really do have a secret though. You wanna know what it is? Luck Picture Quote #1

I realize that I am not a journalist. So anything I say is not important Picture Quote #1

I’m a vulgar lounge entertainer, I don’t need to wear a tie Picture Quote #1

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Confession is a sacred rite enhanced by allegory, exaggeration, and lies Picture Quote #1

I think that clearly it has an influence, to be coming of age during the punk rock era, to come from a difficult and sporadically violent background, to have been in and out of such chaos, I think it actually helps. But I don't know for sure Picture Quote #1

You know, your whole life you're concerned about money for this and that. And then you don't have to worry about it, so you worry about other stuff Picture Quote #1

The wedding took place in Vermont, where they have legalized gay civil unions, and I married a woman Picture Quote #1

I am reasonably happy. I didn't find Jesus or anything like that. Part of it is that I just feel that I could go home. I did not feel like that for a long time, but I could go back now Picture Quote #1

I don't know now if I'm funny. I just keep talking and hope that I hit something that's funny Picture Quote #1

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I hope what I do has an art to it, and as an artist you have to try new things and keep yourself entertained Picture Quote #1

I think I'm just someone that just tries to get by. I'm kind of - if it was during the Second World War, I'd be a black marketeer, I think Picture Quote #1

I've started looking at my own father a bit funny. He assures me, though, that I really am the son of a Scottish postman Picture Quote #1

It's like, it's kind of like if you ever had a car and it was a bit of a clunker but you love it, that's my show. It's a bit of a clunker but I know where everything is and I like it Picture Quote #1

It's the beauty and curse of doing a daily show. Some days you've got nothing to talk about and other days Dick Cheney shoots his lawyer in the face and everyone is happy Picture Quote #1

Santa blows all these shipping companies away. He delivers more than 2 billion packages in just 24 hours. He does it by sleigh. He doesn’t use tracking numbers and doesn’t use trucks. He just uses midgets and a giant bag Picture Quote #1

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I used to love going fishing. I think it was really about the clothes. Nothing says real man like a vest with 38 pockets and a mesh hat with hooks in it Picture Quote #1

Pseudoscience describes theories that sound like science but are actually just made up, like aromatherapy or biorhythms or love Picture Quote #1

Acid gave me a clinical, unblinking look at madness, and I discovered I wasn’t brave enough to be insane Picture Quote #1

I think people are as individual as snowflakes, they kinda look alike but no two are the exactly the same, and all classification is the root of prejudice Picture Quote #1

All they teach you in drama school is how to do stage fights and be a pain in rehearsals Picture Quote #1

I don’t see my show as a stepping stone to something else like some people, who get a job then have a foot out the door looking for their next job Picture Quote #1

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Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

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Text Quotes

I said that the only way I could have a band that would work in the format of my show is if the band were crap. So if I have a band they’d have to really suck. (Craig Ferguson Quotes) I think holidays create so much pressure because people feel they should be having a good time. But you shouldn’t. (Craig Ferguson Quotes) I have no ambitions beyond being comfortable in what I do for a living - and earning a living (Craig Ferguson Quotes) I realized women and humor were linked very closely (Craig Ferguson Quotes) If Scotland and America go to war, I'm afraid I've already sworn in (Craig Ferguson Quotes) I have to do a show which is of interest to me, or else I’m lost (Craig Ferguson Quotes) Other than the laws of physics, rules have never really worked out for me (Craig Ferguson Quotes) I didn’t say no because between safety and adventure I choose adventure (Craig Ferguson Quotes) Much of television has been homogenized in the desire to avoid annoying or upsetting people (Craig Ferguson Quotes) Old people really do have a secret though. You wanna know what it is? Luck (Craig Ferguson Quotes) I realize that I am not a journalist. So anything I say is not important (Craig Ferguson Quotes) I’m a vulgar lounge entertainer, I don’t need to wear a tie (Craig Ferguson Quotes) Confession is a sacred rite enhanced by allegory, exaggeration, and lies (Craig Ferguson Quotes) I think that clearly it has an influence, to be coming of age during the punk rock era, to come from a difficult and sporadically violent background, to have been in and out of such chaos, I think it actually helps. But I don't know for sure (Craig Ferguson Quotes) You know, your whole life you're concerned about money for this and that. And then you don't have to worry about it, so you worry about other stuff (Craig Ferguson Quotes) The wedding took place in Vermont, where they have legalized gay civil unions, and I married a woman (Craig Ferguson Quotes) I am reasonably happy. I didn't find Jesus or anything like that. Part of it is that I just feel that I could go home. I did not feel like that for a long time, but I could go back now (Craig Ferguson Quotes) I don't know now if I'm funny. I just keep talking and hope that I hit something that's funny (Craig Ferguson Quotes) I hope what I do has an art to it, and as an artist you have to try new things and keep yourself entertained (Craig Ferguson Quotes) I think I'm just someone that just tries to get by. I'm kind of - if it was during the Second World War, I'd be a black marketeer, I think (Craig Ferguson Quotes) I've started looking at my own father a bit funny. He assures me, though, that I really am the son of a Scottish postman (Craig Ferguson Quotes) It's like, it's kind of like if you ever had a car and it was a bit of a clunker but you love it, that's my show. It's a bit of a clunker but I know where everything is and I like it (Craig Ferguson Quotes) It's the beauty and curse of doing a daily show. Some days you've got nothing to talk about and other days Dick Cheney shoots his lawyer in the face and everyone is happy (Craig Ferguson Quotes) Santa blows all these shipping companies away. He delivers more than 2 billion packages in just 24 hours. He does it by sleigh. He doesn’t use tracking numbers and doesn’t use trucks. He just uses midgets and a giant bag (Craig Ferguson Quotes) I used to love going fishing. I think it was really about the clothes. Nothing says real man like a vest with 38 pockets and a mesh hat with hooks in it (Craig Ferguson Quotes) Pseudoscience describes theories that sound like science but are actually just made up, like aromatherapy or biorhythms or love (Craig Ferguson Quotes) Acid gave me a clinical, unblinking look at madness, and I discovered I wasn’t brave enough to be insane (Craig Ferguson Quotes) I think people are as individual as snowflakes, they kinda look alike but no two are the exactly the same, and all classification is the root of prejudice (Craig Ferguson Quotes) All they teach you in drama school is how to do stage fights and be a pain in rehearsals (Craig Ferguson Quotes) I don’t see my show as a stepping stone to something else like some people, who get a job then have a foot out the door looking for their next job (Craig Ferguson Quotes)

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