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Craig Kilborn Quotes

There was an embarrassing moment at a recent Democratic fundraiser. When John Kerry was handed a $10 million dollar check, he said, ‘I do.’ Picture Quote #1

Comedy doesn’t always have to come from a dark place Picture Quote #1

People who go into show business are screwed up Picture Quote #1

Declassified papers report that John Kennedy was taking eight different medications a day. He was so wasted, his Secret Service code name was Ted Kennedy Picture Quote #1

People here in Los Angeles are disgusted now about a sex scandal involving Arnold Schwarzenegger. Apparently for seven years, he carried on a sexual relationship with his own wife Picture Quote #1

Democrats were quick to point out that President Bush’s budget creates a 1 trillion dollar deficit. The White House quickly responded with ‘Hey, look over there, it’s Saddam Hussein.’ Picture Quote #1

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Did you see the statue topple? Bill Clinton got nostalgic seeing something that big in a beret go down Picture Quote #1

In Massachusetts, scientists have created the first human clone. The bad thing is that in thirty years, the clone will still be depressed because the Boston Red Sox will still have not won a World Series Picture Quote #1

New rumors that Saddam Hussein is planning to flee to a castle in Libya with 10 billion dollars. Now President Bush doesn’t know whether to nuke him or give him a tax cut Picture Quote #1

Senator Hillary Clinton is attacking President Bush for breaking his campaign promise to cut carbon dioxide emissions, saying a promise made, a promise broken. And then out of habit, she demanded that Bush spend the night on the couch Picture Quote #1

While there’s no ‘I’ in team, there’s also no ‘you’, okay? So back off Picture Quote #1

Happy birthday to former First Lady Barbara Bush, who turned seventy-seven this week. Unfortunately, where her granddaughters helped blow out the candles on her cake, it exploded Picture Quote #1

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Apparently, six women claim that Arnold Schwarzenegger groped them while working on his movies. Hats off to these women who admit they worked on Arnold’s movies Picture Quote #1

Over ten thousand people have signed a petition to recall Governor Schwarzenegger. I’m sorry, that is next year’s joke Picture Quote #1

Yesterday Jerry Springer bowed out of the Ohio Senate race. He said, ‘If I can’t run the most embarrassing campaign in America, then I’m out of here.’ Picture Quote #1

Strange medical news from Pakistan: A man had a successful organ transplant with a dog. They gave the man a dog’s organ. In a related story today, Keith Richards was seen chasing a mailman Picture Quote #1

President Bush is trying to put a positive spin on the latest bad economic numbers. Today he declared victory in the ‘War on Jobs.’ Picture Quote #1

Singer Boy Dylan was stopped at his own sow by security guards who failed to recognize the singer. Asked to comment, Dylan replied, ‘I can hardly blame them. Look at me.’ Picture Quote #1

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Critics say Arnold has no previous government experience, but advisers say he’s clearly the most qualified Austrian, ex-Mr. Universe in the race Picture Quote #1

President Bush says in the last month he has created 300,000 new jobs. Yeah, they’re called Kerry campaign workers Picture Quote #1

Boeing is working on an invisible fighter jet so nobody can see who’s flying it. Didn’t George Bush fly this in the National Guard, I believe? Picture Quote #1

The election is in full-swing. Republicans have taken out round-the-clock ads promoting George Bush. Don’t we already have that? It’s called Fox News Picture Quote #1

A study shows breast implants can cause nausea and dizziness... from all the free drinks Picture Quote #1

I think mankind is overly sensitive, very needy, greedy, and flawed Picture Quote #1

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I think that you’re always going to have some people who are negative or view you in a certain way Picture Quote #1

A telephone survey says that 51 percent of college students drink until they pass out at least once a month. The other 49 percent didn’t answer the phone Picture Quote #1

The places I’ve worked in the past, I always stayed three years and moved on Picture Quote #1

I enjoyed retirement the right way linguine con vongole, red wine and plenty of truffle cheese Picture Quote #1

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Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

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Text Quotes

There was an embarrassing moment at a recent Democratic fundraiser. When John Kerry was handed a $10 million dollar check, he said, ‘I do.’ (Craig Kilborn Quotes) Comedy doesn’t always have to come from a dark place (Craig Kilborn Quotes) People who go into show business are screwed up (Craig Kilborn Quotes) Declassified papers report that John Kennedy was taking eight different medications a day. He was so wasted, his Secret Service code name was Ted Kennedy (Craig Kilborn Quotes) People here in Los Angeles are disgusted now about a sex scandal involving Arnold Schwarzenegger. Apparently for seven years, he carried on a sexual relationship with his own wife (Craig Kilborn Quotes) Democrats were quick to point out that President Bush’s budget creates a 1 trillion dollar deficit. The White House quickly responded with ‘Hey, look over there, it’s Saddam Hussein.’ (Craig Kilborn Quotes) Did you see the statue topple? Bill Clinton got nostalgic seeing something that big in a beret go down (Craig Kilborn Quotes) In Massachusetts, scientists have created the first human clone. The bad thing is that in thirty years, the clone will still be depressed because the Boston Red Sox will still have not won a World Series (Craig Kilborn Quotes) New rumors that Saddam Hussein is planning to flee to a castle in Libya with 10 billion dollars. Now President Bush doesn’t know whether to nuke him or give him a tax cut (Craig Kilborn Quotes) Senator Hillary Clinton is attacking President Bush for breaking his campaign promise to cut carbon dioxide emissions, saying a promise made, a promise broken. And then out of habit, she demanded that Bush spend the night on the couch (Craig Kilborn Quotes) While there’s no ‘I’ in team, there’s also no ‘you’, okay? So back off (Craig Kilborn Quotes) Happy birthday to former First Lady Barbara Bush, who turned seventy-seven this week. Unfortunately, where her granddaughters helped blow out the candles on her cake, it exploded (Craig Kilborn Quotes) Apparently, six women claim that Arnold Schwarzenegger groped them while working on his movies. Hats off to these women who admit they worked on Arnold’s movies (Craig Kilborn Quotes) Over ten thousand people have signed a petition to recall Governor Schwarzenegger. I’m sorry, that is next year’s joke (Craig Kilborn Quotes) Yesterday Jerry Springer bowed out of the Ohio Senate race. He said, ‘If I can’t run the most embarrassing campaign in America, then I’m out of here.’ (Craig Kilborn Quotes) Strange medical news from Pakistan: A man had a successful organ transplant with a dog. They gave the man a dog’s organ. In a related story today, Keith Richards was seen chasing a mailman (Craig Kilborn Quotes) President Bush is trying to put a positive spin on the latest bad economic numbers. Today he declared victory in the ‘War on Jobs.’ (Craig Kilborn Quotes) Singer Boy Dylan was stopped at his own sow by security guards who failed to recognize the singer. Asked to comment, Dylan replied, ‘I can hardly blame them. Look at me.’ (Craig Kilborn Quotes) Critics say Arnold has no previous government experience, but advisers say he’s clearly the most qualified Austrian, ex-Mr. Universe in the race (Craig Kilborn Quotes) President Bush says in the last month he has created 300,000 new jobs. Yeah, they’re called Kerry campaign workers (Craig Kilborn Quotes) Boeing is working on an invisible fighter jet so nobody can see who’s flying it. Didn’t George Bush fly this in the National Guard, I believe? (Craig Kilborn Quotes) The election is in full-swing. Republicans have taken out round-the-clock ads promoting George Bush. Don’t we already have that? It’s called Fox News (Craig Kilborn Quotes) A study shows breast implants can cause nausea and dizziness... from all the free drinks (Craig Kilborn Quotes) I think mankind is overly sensitive, very needy, greedy, and flawed (Craig Kilborn Quotes) I think that you’re always going to have some people who are negative or view you in a certain way (Craig Kilborn Quotes) A telephone survey says that 51 percent of college students drink until they pass out at least once a month. The other 49 percent didn’t answer the phone (Craig Kilborn Quotes) The places I’ve worked in the past, I always stayed three years and moved on (Craig Kilborn Quotes) I enjoyed retirement the right way linguine con vongole, red wine and plenty of truffle cheese (Craig Kilborn Quotes)

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