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Dennis Miller Quotes

Elected office holds more perks than Elvis’ nightstand Picture Quote #1

I rant, therefore I am Picture Quote #1

I’m like Bush, I see the world more like checkers than chess Picture Quote #1

Washington, DC is to lying what Wisconsin is to cheese Picture Quote #1

You’ve got bad eating habits if you use a grocery cart in 7-Eleven Picture Quote #1

It’s nice to be included in the broadcast food chain Picture Quote #1

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But the biggest fake of the year, Paul Begala’s last smile Picture Quote #1

I don’t need to be born again. I got it right the first time Picture Quote #1

Hey, what if those crop circles are just ads for Target? Picture Quote #1

Twitter! Never have lives been less lived and more chronicled! Picture Quote #1

The death penalty is becoming a way of life in this country Picture Quote #1

Santa is very jolly because he knows where all the bad girls live Picture Quote #1

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I don’t have credibility, I’m a comedian Picture Quote #1

Sometimes you just have the thin the herd Picture Quote #1

Of course, that’s just my opinion. I could be wrong Picture Quote #1

I’d rather be funny than wise Picture Quote #1

How many of those dead animals you see on the highway are suicides? Picture Quote #1

Everybody has to sell out at some point to make a living Picture Quote #1

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Here in Hollywood you can actually get a marriage license printed on an Etch-A-Sketch Picture Quote #1

I’m a comedian, for God’s sake. Viewers shouldn’t trust me. And you know what? They’re hip enough to know they shouldn’t trust me. I’m just doing stand-up comedy Picture Quote #1

Never ever discount the idea of marriage. Sure, someone might tell you that marriage is just a piece of paper. Well, so is money, and what’s more life-affirming than cold, hard cash? Picture Quote #1

The American education system couldn’t be more badly directed or poorly funded if the Secretary of Education were Ed Wood Picture Quote #1

You know there is a problem with the education system when you realize that out of the 3 R’s only one begins with an R Picture Quote #1

A new poll shows that Senator Kerry’s support in the South is strongest amongst blacks. Kerry’s appeal to Southern blacks is obvious. He is a white man who lives far, far away Picture Quote #1

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Human beings are human beings. They say what they want, don’t they? They used to say it across the fence while they were hanging wash. Now they just say it on the Internet Picture Quote #1

If Clinton had only attacked terrorism as much as he attacks George Bush we wouldn’t be in this problem Picture Quote #1

Now, I don’t want to get off on a rant here, but guilt is simply God’s way of letting you know that you’re having too good a time Picture Quote #1

Parenting is the most important job on the planet next to keeping Gary Busey off the nation’s highways Picture Quote #1

President Bush gave his first-ever presidential radio address in both English and Spanish. Reaction was mixed, however, as people were trying to figure out which one was which Picture Quote #1

The average American’s day planner has fewer holes in it than Ray Charles’s dart board Picture Quote #1

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Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

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Text Quotes

Elected office holds more perks than Elvis’ nightstand (Dennis Miller Quotes) I rant, therefore I am (Dennis Miller Quotes) I’m like Bush, I see the world more like checkers than chess (Dennis Miller Quotes) Washington, DC is to lying what Wisconsin is to cheese (Dennis Miller Quotes) You’ve got bad eating habits if you use a grocery cart in 7-Eleven (Dennis Miller Quotes) It’s nice to be included in the broadcast food chain (Dennis Miller Quotes) But the biggest fake of the year, Paul Begala’s last smile (Dennis Miller Quotes) I don’t need to be born again. I got it right the first time. (Dennis Miller Quotes) Hey, what if those crop circles are just ads for Target? (Dennis Miller Quotes) Twitter! Never have lives been less lived and more chronicled! (Dennis Miller Quotes) The death penalty is becoming a way of life in this country (Dennis Miller Quotes) Santa is very jolly because he knows where all the bad girls live (Dennis Miller Quotes) I don’t have credibility, I’m a comedian (Dennis Miller Quotes) Sometimes you just have the thin the herd (Dennis Miller Quotes) Of course, that’s just my opinion. I could be wrong (Dennis Miller Quotes) I’d rather be funny than wise (Dennis Miller Quotes) How many of those dead animals you see on the highway are suicides? (Dennis Miller Quotes) Everybody has to sell out at some point to make a living (Dennis Miller Quotes) Here in Hollywood you can actually get a marriage license printed on an Etch-A-Sketch (Dennis Miller Quotes) I’m a comedian, for God’s sake. Viewers shouldn’t trust me. And you know what? They’re hip enough to know they shouldn’t trust me. I’m just doing stand-up comedy (Dennis Miller Quotes) Never ever discount the idea of marriage. Sure, someone might tell you that marriage is just a piece of paper. Well, so is money, and what’s more life-affirming than cold, hard cash? (Dennis Miller Quotes) The American education system couldn’t be more badly directed or poorly funded if the Secretary of Education were Ed Wood (Dennis Miller Quotes) You know there is a problem with the education system when you realize that out of the 3 R’s only one begins with an R (Dennis Miller Quotes) A new poll shows that Senator Kerry’s support in the South is strongest amongst blacks. Kerry’s appeal to Southern blacks is obvious. He is a white man who lives far, far away (Dennis Miller Quotes) Human beings are human beings. They say what they want, don’t they? They used to say it across the fence while they were hanging wash. Now they just say it on the Internet (Dennis Miller Quotes) If Clinton had only attacked terrorism as much as he attacks George Bush we wouldn’t be in this problem (Dennis Miller Quotes) Now, I don’t want to get off on a rant here, but guilt is simply God’s way of letting you know that you’re having too good a time (Dennis Miller Quotes) Parenting is the most important job on the planet next to keeping Gary Busey off the nation’s highways (Dennis Miller Quotes) President Bush gave his first-ever presidential radio address in both English and Spanish. Reaction was mixed, however, as people were trying to figure out which one was which (Dennis Miller Quotes) The average American’s day planner has fewer holes in it than Ray Charles’s dart board (Dennis Miller Quotes)

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