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Dov Davidoff Quotes
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Friendship Quotes
Love Quotes
Life Quotes
Funny Quotes
Motivational Quotes
Inspirational Quotes
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Text Quotes
Few things interest me more than the things people don’t say (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
False humility is thinly veiled ego disguised as self confidence (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
Fear can be a great motivator, just not during foreplay (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
How can there not already be a rapper named ‘O’pinion’ (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
Canadians are like Americans, just less racist, violent, and ignorant (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
Only bugs can truly appreciate the beauty of flowers (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
Homemade’ sounds much better when not referring to tattoos (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
Do you love me for me?... I don’t even love me for me. (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
Health food would seem healthier if the people that sold it looked less unhealthy (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
I wish I could be attracted to unattractive women. They’re just more interesting (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
America’s objective in the Middle East is to create democracy in the same way that my goal on a first date to feed women (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
Being anti-social can also mean that you’re aware of how annoying it is to be social (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
Most public bathrooms now have automatic toilet sensors. People can’t even be trusted to flush (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
When I was a kid I remember thinking, if I had a girl, I would treat her really well. Little did I know, they don’t always like that (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
There must be 15 shows about people’s jobs: ‘Ice Road Trucker,’ ‘Axe Men,’ ‘Dirty Jobs.’ Unemployment is so high, we’re watching people work (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
Marriage is supposed to be permanent. It’s like a tattoo that yells at you (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
Writing good jokes requires effort. Think I’ll just start dressing funnier (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
Whoever said life without love isn’t worth living didn’t own an iPhone. These things are great (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
If I were a bad black comic I would name my special, Yo mama, and other stories of a lack of self awareness (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
My job as a comedian is to heighten awareness about locally grown produce, fight factory farming, and promote euthanasia, but in a funny way (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
Flying first class means sitting next to a better class of person I don’t want to talk to (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
Ending a sentence with yo, is like saying, I don’t want a job. Not today. Not ever. Know what I mean yo? (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
Guys don’t use the word pretty enough. Like, hey Mike, did you get that shirt at the game? Looks really pretty on you (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
The worst part about people with bad personalities is they don’t know it (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
Mirrors at the gym only serve to remind me that I’m less of a man than I’d like to be (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
Dating is great unless you don’t like horrible awkwardness, lying, and a deep foreboding sense of disappointment that never goes away (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
Gay men greet each other just like straight guys do... If one of the straight guys saved the other one’s life (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
Monogamy is god’s way of making death seem like a more reasonable option (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
The Nazis were well dressed. Today’s racists are a rag-tag bunch with no sense of style or panache (Dov Davidoff Quotes)
Is there anything more attractive than a woman in high heels and low self esteem (Dov Davidoff Quotes)