Drunk Quotes
Text Quotes
Not sure why people dislike receiving drunk texts. You’re the only person they’re thinking of when their brain can’t function properly (Drunk Quotes)
Let’s celebrate your birthday somewhere with cheap enough drinks that I can get drunk enough to ruin your birthday (Drunk Quotes)
My girlfriend told me to go out and get something that makes her look sexy. So I came back drunk (Drunk Quotes)
Lets get drunk and tell each other everything we’re too afraid to say sober (Drunk Quotes)
Best of luck on whatever diet you’re trying until the next time you get drunk (Drunk Quotes)
There are only two types of honest people. Small children and drunk people (Drunk Quotes)
Don’t ever forget what someone says to you while they’re drunk, because drunk words are sober thoughts (Drunk Quotes)
I don’t make enough money to go on vacation, so I’m just going to get drunk this weekend until I don’t know where I am (Drunk Quotes)
I hope you’re the least fat, bald, broke, embarrassingly drunk person at your high school reunion (Drunk Quotes)
I know a great wine that pairs with you sitting and watching me get drunk (Drunk Quotes)
Don’t make promises when you’re happy. Don’t reply when you’re angry. Don’t make decisions when you’re sad. Don’t text when you’re drunk (Drunk Quotes)
So as not to feel the horrible burden of time that breaks your back and bends you to the earth, be endlessly drunk (Drunk Quotes)
I need to leave work early today so I can maneuver through drunk people to get home and drink (Drunk Quotes)
There is a certain type of conversation one hears only when one is drunk and it is like a dream, full of humor and threat and significance, deep significance (Drunk Quotes)
Drunk people make me nervous because I’m afraid they will hurt me, break my stuff or say truths to me (Drunk Quotes)
My apologies if you were under the impression that I have feelings because I only have one. Drunk (Drunk Quotes)
A good writer is not, per se, a good book critic. No more so than a good drunk is automatically a good bartender (Drunk Quotes)
Let me apologize right now for all of the drunk tweets and pictures that will be posted tonight. Don’t hate me. Bye (Drunk Quotes)
People can hide all things, except two: 1, that they are drunk. And 2, that they are in love (Drunk Quotes)
Come, for my part I will have only those glorious, manly pleasures of being very drunk, and very slovenly (Drunk Quotes)
Only what we have lost forever do we possess forever. Only when we have drunk from the river of darkness can we truly see. Only when our legs have rotted off can we truly dance. As long as there is death, there is hope (Drunk Quotes)
There’s a long tradition of teen comedies where the kids are getting drunk on beer and whatever else, so smoking a joint to me is no worse than having a beer. So, if someone has a problem with it, I’ll just tell them to relax (Drunk Quotes)
Look, this is an odd question, but you’re kind of cute and you’re pretty nice to me. Are you drunk? It’s OK if you are (Drunk Quotes)
Public service announcement: In case of a terrorist attack, bottled water and duct tape are not going to do a damn thing. So do what Homeland Security Dir. Tom Ridge does: Get really drunk, and pick up a hooker (Drunk Quotes)
Belfastas uncivilised as ever--savage black mothers in houses of dark red brick, friendly manufacturers too drunk to entertain you when you arrive. It amuses me till I get tired (Drunk Quotes)
The big story now is that President Bush is coming under attack for his service in the National Guard. The White House said, ‘no no,’ that they have payroll records to show that he served in the National Guard. But today, the commanding officers can’t remember seeing Bush between May and October of 72. President Bush said, ‘Remember me? I’m the drunk guy. Remember me?’ (Drunk Quotes)
If someone opens a glorious Scotch or a bottle of wine, it’s no more than a whimsy, but after nearly 40 years I’m used to it. I don’t find it difficult not being drunk when other people are, but I get uncomfortable because they’re uncomfortable with where I am (Drunk Quotes)
A few years ago, before I stopped drinking, I was feeling very sorry for myself and very drunk, and I Googled ‘Moby Sucks’. In less than one second something like 20 million responses came up... yeah, there has been a lot of loathing directed towards me, and it used to drive me crazy (Drunk Quotes)
If you’re going to drive a Hummer and buy carbon offsets, that’s like getting drunk every night and getting into an AA meeting, throwing money in the basket, and leaving (Drunk Quotes)
The thing that I think a lot of guys need to know how to do is not take your mother’s advice about honesty being the best policy. Listen to your cool, drunk uncle who tells you to lie. Those are the relationships that last. (Drunk Quotes)