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Esther Perel Quotes

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The ability to go anywhere in our imagination is a pure expression of individual freedom. It is a creative force that can help us transcend reality.  (Esther Perel Quotes) Today, monogamy is one person at a time  (Esther Perel Quotes) Modern love is the enterprise that everyone wants to be a part of, yet there’s a fifty percent divorce rate in round one and a sixty-five percent divorce rate in round two.  (Esther Perel Quotes) In dating, if you say no, your lover goes on to the next person. In marriage, if you say no, the person stays.  (Esther Perel Quotes) Women want to talk first, connect first, then have sex. For men, sex is the connection. Sex is man’s language of intimacy  (Esther Perel Quotes) Are you asking a question because you want to know the answer or are you asking the question because you want your partner to know that you are having this question  (Esther Perel Quotes) It’s our imagination that’s responsible for love, not the other person  (Esther Perel Quotes) When there is nothing left to hide, there is nothing left to seek  (Esther Perel Quotes) Romantics value intensity over stability. Realists value security over passion. But both are often disappointed, for few people can live happily at either extreme  (Esther Perel Quotes) Love is a vessel that contains both security and adventure, and commitment offers one of the great luxuries of life: time. Marriage is not the end of romance, it is the beginning  (Esther Perel Quotes) At the same time, eroticism in the home requires active engagement and willful intent. It is an ongoing resistance to the message that marriage is serious, more work than play; and that passion is for teenagers and the immature. We must unpack our ambivalence about pleasure, and challenge our pervasive discomfort with sexuality, particularly in the context of family. Complaining of sexual boredom is easy and conventional. Nurturing eroticism in the home is an act of open defience  (Esther Perel Quotes) It’s hard to feel attracted to someone who has abandoned her sense of autonomy  (Esther Perel Quotes) Love rests on two pillars: surrender and autonomy. Our need for togetherness exists alongside our need for separateness  (Esther Perel Quotes) Eroticism thrives in the space between the self and the other  (Esther Perel Quotes) Our partner’s sexuality does not belong to us. It isn’t just for and about us, and we should not assume that it rightfully falls within our jurisdiction  (Esther Perel Quotes) Today, we turn to one person to provide what an entire village once did: a sense of grounding, meaning, and continuity. At the same time, we expect our committed relationships to be romantic as well as emotionally and sexually fulfilling. Is it any wonder that so many relationships crumble under the weight of it all?  (Esther Perel Quotes) Everyone should cultivate a secret garden  (Esther Perel Quotes) Love enjoys knowing everything about you; desire needs mystery  (Esther Perel Quotes) Very often we don’t go elsewhere because we are looking for another person. We go elsewhere because we are looking for another self. It isn’t so much that we want to leave the person we are with as we want to leave the person we have become  (Esther Perel Quotes) If you start to feel that you have given up too many parts of yourself to be with your partner, then one day you will end up looking for another person in order to reconnect with those lost parts  (Esther Perel Quotes) Mystery is not always about travelling to new places, it is about looking with new eyes  (Esther Perel Quotes) It isn’t so much that we want to leave the person we are with as we want to leave the person we have become  (Esther Perel Quotes) Sometimes it has to do with other longings that are much more existential. Sometimes you go elsewhere not because you are not liking the one you are with; you are not liking the person you have become  (Esther Perel Quotes) We used to moralize; today we normalize, and performance anxiety is the secular version of our old religious guilt  (Esther Perel Quotes) When we seek the gaze of another, it isn’t always our partner we’re turning away from, but the person we have ourselves become  (Esther Perel Quotes) What is the relationship between love and desire? How do they relate, and how do they conflict?... Therein lies the mystery of eroticism  (Esther Perel Quotes)