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Funny Alcohol Quotes

My doctor said

Here’s to blacking out! Picture Quote #1

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day Picture Quote #1

I'm never drinking again. Ever Picture Quote #1

Get me a vodka rocks. Mom, it’s breakfast. And a piece of toast Picture Quote #1

Yay! There is room to add vodka Picture Quote #1

But why is the rum gone? Picture Quote #1

I drink therefore I am Picture Quote #1

I can’t do that... without alcohol Picture Quote #1

Hurry, dear... if you miss the bus you’ll have to walk ‘cause mommy can’t drink and drive Picture Quote #1

I saw this wino eating grapes. I was like, dude, you have to wait Picture Quote #1

A person with a basement full of vodka: Alcoholic. A person with a basement full of wine: Classy Picture Quote #1

I thought two bottles per person would be enough, maybe if we were in high school Picture Quote #1

It's true, alcohol kills people. But how many are born because of it? Picture Quote #1

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth Picture Quote #1

I don't drink these days. I am allergic to alcohol and narcotics. I break out in handcuffs Picture Quote #1

I limit myself to one glass of wine a day Picture Quote #1

If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt Picture Quote #1

Beer is the cause and solution to all of life's problems Picture Quote #1

Irish aerobics Picture Quote #1

Clear alcohols are for rich women on diets Picture Quote #1

Someday when you have kids of your own, you'll understand why mommy and daddy drink Picture Quote #1

Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut Picture Quote #2

I'm not an alcoholic, alcoholics go to meetings. I'm a drunk, we go to parties Picture Quote #1

Well, from this day forward, I Peter Griffin, will never drink again. Peter, what are you doing? Crack Picture Quote #1

Maybe it’s the wine talking, but I want more wine Picture Quote #1

Because alcohol tastes better than tears Picture Quote #1

Step aside coffee, this is a job for alcohol Picture Quote #1

Drink took to me, said Simple. Whiskey just naturally likes me but beer likes me better Picture Quote #1

So once again you’re faced with the classic Irishman’s dilemma: Do I eat the potato now? Or do I ferment so I can drink it later? Picture Quote #1

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Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

Text Quotes

My doctor said "only one glass of alcohol a day" - I can live with that (Funny Alcohol Quotes) Here’s to blacking out! (Funny Alcohol Quotes) I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day (Funny Alcohol Quotes) I'm never drinking again. Ever (Funny Alcohol Quotes) Get me a vodka rocks. Mom, it’s breakfast. And a piece of toast (Funny Alcohol Quotes) Yay! There is room to add vodka (Funny Alcohol Quotes) But why is the rum gone? (Funny Alcohol Quotes) I drink therefore I am (Funny Alcohol Quotes) I can’t do that... without alcohol (Funny Alcohol Quotes) Hurry, dear... if you miss the bus you’ll have to walk ‘cause mommy can’t drink and drive (Funny Alcohol Quotes) I saw this wino eating grapes. I was like, dude, you have to wait (Funny Alcohol Quotes) A person with a basement full of vodka: Alcoholic. A person with a basement full of wine: Classy (Funny Alcohol Quotes) I thought two bottles per person would be enough, maybe if we were in high school (Funny Alcohol Quotes) It's true, alcohol kills people. But how many are born because of it? (Funny Alcohol Quotes) It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth (Funny Alcohol Quotes) I don't drink these days. I am allergic to alcohol and narcotics. I break out in handcuffs (Funny Alcohol Quotes) I limit myself to one glass of wine a day (Funny Alcohol Quotes) If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt (Funny Alcohol Quotes) Beer is the cause and solution to all of life's problems (Funny Alcohol Quotes) Irish aerobics (Funny Alcohol Quotes) Clear alcohols are for rich women on diets (Funny Alcohol Quotes) Someday when you have kids of your own, you'll understand why mommy and daddy drink (Funny Alcohol Quotes) Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut (Funny Alcohol Quotes) I'm not an alcoholic, alcoholics go to meetings. I'm a drunk, we go to parties (Funny Alcohol Quotes) Well, from this day forward, I Peter Griffin, will never drink again. Peter, what are you doing? Crack (Funny Alcohol Quotes) Maybe it’s the wine talking, but I want more wine (Funny Alcohol Quotes) Because alcohol tastes better than tears (Funny Alcohol Quotes) Step aside coffee, this is a job for alcohol (Funny Alcohol Quotes) Drink took to me, said Simple. Whiskey just naturally likes me but beer likes me better (Funny Alcohol Quotes) So once again you’re faced with the classic Irishman’s dilemma: Do I eat the potato now? Or do I ferment so I can drink it later? (Funny Alcohol Quotes)

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