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Jarod Kintz Quotes

I want to be able to convert sunlight to iron, because your body needs it to live, particularly if an attacker is wielding a sword at you Picture Quote #1

I had a dream about you. You were in love with me, and I only had eyes for you. Of course, I had other body parts to offer you, one long on in particular Picture Quote #1

I was hot so I gave myself a haircut. I then saw a bald man sweating, so I offered to tweeze his eyebrows. He accepted and was so grateful that he offered to trade mustaches with me. In remembrance of that special bonding moment, I still wear his mustache over my left nipple Picture Quote #1

How to get money: earn it, steal it, borrow it, beg for it, or inherit it. So, who do I have to kill to get rich? Picture Quote #1

The easiest way to hide your gold is to disguise it as Spanish bullion and store it on the bottom of the ocean floor Picture Quote #1

Never let go of a good thing without a fight. Especially if that good thing is a pair of boxing gloves Picture Quote #1

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My brain is divided into two butterflies, and both are in love with your rose-shaped heart. If you’ve got the garden, I’ve got my whole life Picture Quote #1

I want to get the words Courage and Bravery tattooed across my back, so people could associate me with those things as they read them while they chase me Picture Quote #1

Can you break my five-dollar bill into five singles? Women love guys with lots of money Picture Quote #1

Sometimes love will break your heart in two. Or three, depending on if there’s an extra person involved, or how unmanageably large your heart is Picture Quote #1

I wanted to tell her I love you back, but I guess in waiting for the perfect moment (the next commercial break), I ended up completely forgetting Picture Quote #1

A brick could be used to keep warm, and a blanket could be used to build a house Picture Quote #1

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A brick could be used as a doorstop. But why bother? To promote an open-door policy, I had all the walls knocked down Picture Quote #1

Love is a bridge between your future and mine. A bridge constructed entirely out of trust, honesty, and in our case, wooden planks Picture Quote #1

Love is a rainbow, a bridge of bright colors. On the scale of love, I can go from Leprechaun to pot of gold in under 38 inches Picture Quote #1

When I got married, I could not have chosen a more gorgeous, loving, or perfect woman to crush than the one I broke up with to be with my wife Picture Quote #1

After they broke up, Renaldo’s ex girlfriend said to never again date an older woman. And he wisely listened to her, because his mother only had his best interest in mind Picture Quote #1

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A sister should set her brother up with one of her friends, unless her only friend is her sister Picture Quote #1

I invented underwear with only one leg hole, for people who like to concentrate on frozen orange juice while bungee jumping from a tampon string Picture Quote #1

Hide things everywhere. Forget about them. Find them randomly and feel surprised like a pirate finding buried treasure. Avoid scurvy. Love more Picture Quote #1

I had a dream about you. I was a small business owner, and you were also a small business owner. The difference was I was a sole proprietor, and you were a midget Picture Quote #1

To fast track your business and become the Roger Bannister of personal branding, be a connector, accumulator, accelerator and facilitator of relationships Picture Quote #1

Flower petals in the breeze look like a butterfly flapping its wings. My love for you takes flight like a white orchid blushing pink Picture Quote #1

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If you could buy time, I would sell it. Yesterday would be expensive, and tomorrow would be cheap Picture Quote #1

The quickest way to a man’s heart is through his urethra. If you hurry, you can make it to mine in under 15 dollars. I mean minutes Picture Quote #1

Candle making is a half-ass business, because the product is only useful half the day, at night. Why not make candles that double as dildos, and make it a whole-ass business Picture Quote #1

I shave my face like a car. I speed through car washes, but I brake for love Picture Quote #1

A brick could be modified to be a cell phone, for construction workers who miss the easy to find cell phone size of the 1980s Picture Quote #1

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Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

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Text Quotes

I want to be able to convert sunlight to iron, because your body needs it to live, particularly if an attacker is wielding a sword at you. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) I had a dream about you. You were in love with me, and I only had eyes for you. Of course, I had other body parts to offer you, one long on in particular. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) I was hot so I gave myself a haircut. I then saw a bald man sweating, so I offered to tweeze his eyebrows. He accepted and was so grateful that he offered to trade mustaches with me. In remembrance of that special bonding moment, I still wear his mustache over my left nipple. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) How to get money: earn it, steal it, borrow it, beg for it, or inherit it. So, who do I have to kill to get rich? (Jarod Kintz Quotes) The easiest way to hide your gold is to disguise it as Spanish bullion and store it on the bottom of the ocean floor. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) Never let go of a good thing without a fight. Especially if that good thing is a pair of boxing gloves. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) My brain is divided into two butterflies, and both are in love with your rose-shaped heart. If you’ve got the garden, I’ve got my whole life. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) I want to get the words Courage and Bravery tattooed across my back, so people could associate me with those things as they read them while they chase me. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) Can you break my five-dollar bill into five singles? Women love guys with lots of money. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) Sometimes love will break your heart in two. Or three, depending on if there’s an extra person involved, or how unmanageably large your heart is. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) I wanted to tell her I love you back, but I guess in waiting for the perfect moment (the next commercial break), I ended up completely forgetting. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) A brick could be used to keep warm, and a blanket could be used to build a house (Jarod Kintz Quotes) A brand is built action by action, just as houses are built brick by brick. Is the identity of your personal brand homeless? (Jarod Kintz Quotes) A brick could be used as a doorstop. But why bother? To promote an open-door policy, I had all the walls knocked down. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) Love is a bridge between your future and mine. A bridge constructed entirely out of trust, honesty, and in our case, wooden planks. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) Love is a rainbow, a bridge of bright colors. On the scale of love, I can go from Leprechaun to pot of gold in under 38 inches. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) When I got married, I could not have chosen a more gorgeous, loving, or perfect woman to crush than the one I broke up with to be with my wife. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) After they broke up, Renaldo’s ex girlfriend said to never again date an older woman. And he wisely listened to her, because his mother only had his best interest in mind. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) A sister should set her brother up with one of her friends, unless her only friend is her sister (Jarod Kintz Quotes) I invented underwear with only one leg hole, for people who like to concentrate on frozen orange juice while bungee jumping from a tampon string. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) Hide things everywhere. Forget about them. Find them randomly and feel surprised like a pirate finding buried treasure. Avoid scurvy. Love more. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) I had a dream about you. I was a small business owner, and you were also a small business owner. The difference was I was a sole proprietor, and you were a midget. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) To fast track your business and become the Roger Bannister of personal branding, be a connector, accumulator, accelerator and facilitator of relationships. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) Flower petals in the breeze look like a butterfly flapping its wings. My love for you takes flight like a white orchid blushing pink. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) If you could buy time, I would sell it. Yesterday would be expensive, and tomorrow would be cheap. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) The quickest way to a man’s heart is through his urethra. If you hurry, you can make it to mine in under 15 dollars. I mean minutes. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) Candle making is a half-ass business, because the product is only useful half the day, at night. Why not make candles that double as dildos, and make it a whole-ass business. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) Money is not equal for all people. A strong personal brand adds more lift and leverage. One dollar from me may buy a soda from a car dealership, but one dollar from Justin Bieber may get him a Ferrari. And they’d pay him to drive away. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) I shave my face like a car. I speed through car washes, but I brake for love. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) A brick could be modified to be a cell phone, for construction workers who miss the easy to find cell phone size of the 1980s. (Jarod Kintz Quotes)

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