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Jen Kirkman Quotes

I always try to be open to whatever the universe wants from me Picture Quote #1

Everyone traveling alone is just on their phones the whole time Picture Quote #1

I have a new rule where I only follow fashion people on Instagram Picture Quote #1

By the time I started doing stand-up, the club scene had died Picture Quote #1

Don’t make being a girl or a victim part of your stand-up act. If you encounter sexism in the business, don’t bring it on stage; it’s not funny Picture Quote #1

I think some parents think, ‘Oh, having kids is so beautiful; I want others to feel the joy I do.’ Picture Quote #1

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You teach someone about fallopian tubes in grade school, and you revisit it again in seventh grade for a better understanding of that stuff. I think it’s never-ending. I don’t know why it isn’t all the time Picture Quote #1

At first, there was a separation of clubs and sketch comedy. Now there’s all kinds of comedy, making us one big happy family Picture Quote #1

I want to be one of those cool people that’s like, What is Twitter? and just be totally blind to it Picture Quote #1

Not everyone is there to get an abortion. Your body is like a car that has needs and women’s bodies constantly need a level of care that men don’t Picture Quote #1

I think Twitter is kind of boring, to be honest. To me, it’s not even real life Picture Quote #1

What they call ‘alt-comedy’ now is basically what comedy was like in the 80s. People tried different things, and everybody went to the clubs; there was no other place. Then somehow, the clubs became infiltrated by Dice Clay and Carrot Top types Picture Quote #1

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Parents talk a lot about how much strength and dedication it takes to raise a child. I think it also takes a lot of strength and dedication to carve out a life that doesn’t seem normal to anyone else Picture Quote #1

Instead of saving for someone else’s college education, I’m currently saving for a luxury retirement community replete with golf carts and handsome young male nurses who love butterscotch Picture Quote #1

I don’t like news channels so I have six websites that I check and I get the daily update Picture Quote #1

I mean, I can’t say that I’ve had many deep thoughts because I traveled alone, but it’s good to be with myself in the quiet Picture Quote #1

For me, making any kind of resolution or saying, I’m doing this! can only cause pain, to get very deep Picture Quote #1

A lot of relationships have ended for me in my 20s, because I knew that eventually those people would wanna settle down and have kids Picture Quote #1

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I don’t run around feeling infused with positivity, but I’ll have to be taking my last breath before I’ll admit I’m dying. So I’m either optimistic or in denial Picture Quote #1

Childfree women are actually great assets to the planet. Our carbon footprint is smaller than a mom’s! And we have enough money to write checks to organizations that help kids get vaccinations, vitamins, and educations yet have plenty of free time to advise your daughter that one day she will regret piercing her lip Picture Quote #1

Sometimes I look [ on trolls on Twitter], but even one ignorant comment can make me go, Oh god Picture Quote #1

I don’t have that addictive, What’s going on? feeling anymore, thank God Picture Quote #1

I don’t do jokes about elections so that’s probably why it went okay for me, except for the crazy people that are hate-crime people Picture Quote #1

We have to get women’s stories out there so a guy will read it, laugh, and think, ‘I’m not laughing at a chick story but a story.’ Picture Quote #1

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Having a child is a lifetime commitment, the biggest one you can possibly make Picture Quote #1

I rarely have out-of-town visitors because you have to do things like take them around L.A Picture Quote #1

Couples without kids have each other, their friends, families, and Siri to talk to. It’s not like they’re quarantining themselves in an underground bunker, never to take a romantic stroll on the beach or attend a Morrissey concert ever again. They’re just using birth control Picture Quote #1

My joke is a picture of David Bowie on his balcony in the 70s in a suit in Paris, and unless that’s you, I’m not interested. There are very few aesthetic types that I have, and people who look like that are not always necessarily good for me Picture Quote #1

Its almost Thanksgiving! A day when you get to hear your extended family use racial slurs for groups are not taking away their jobs Picture Quote #1

I have this idyllic love life, but my mind just won’t accept that. I would like to bring a new guy home every night. I try to make humor out of that situation Picture Quote #1

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Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

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Text Quotes

I always try to be open to whatever the universe wants from me (Jen Kirkman Quotes) Everyone traveling alone is just on their phones the whole time (Jen Kirkman Quotes) I have a new rule where I only follow fashion people on Instagram (Jen Kirkman Quotes) By the time I started doing stand-up, the club scene had died (Jen Kirkman Quotes) Don’t make being a girl or a victim part of your stand-up act. If you encounter sexism in the business, don’t bring it on stage; it’s not funny. (Jen Kirkman Quotes) I think some parents think, ‘Oh, having kids is so beautiful; I want others to feel the joy I do.’ (Jen Kirkman Quotes) You teach someone about fallopian tubes in grade school, and you revisit it again in seventh grade for a better understanding of that stuff. I think it’s never-ending. I don’t know why it isn’t all the time. (Jen Kirkman Quotes) At first, there was a separation of clubs and sketch comedy. Now there’s all kinds of comedy, making us one big happy family. (Jen Kirkman Quotes) I want to be one of those cool people that’s like, What is Twitter? and just be totally blind to it. (Jen Kirkman Quotes) Not everyone is there to get an abortion. Your body is like a car that has needs and women’s bodies constantly need a level of care that men don’t. (Jen Kirkman Quotes) I think Twitter is kind of boring, to be honest. To me, it’s not even real life. (Jen Kirkman Quotes) What they call ‘alt-comedy’ now is basically what comedy was like in the 80s. People tried different things, and everybody went to the clubs; there was no other place. Then somehow, the clubs became infiltrated by Dice Clay and Carrot Top types. (Jen Kirkman Quotes) Parents talk a lot about how much strength and dedication it takes to raise a child. I think it also takes a lot of strength and dedication to carve out a life that doesn’t seem normal to anyone else. (Jen Kirkman Quotes) Instead of saving for someone else’s college education, I’m currently saving for a luxury retirement community replete with golf carts and handsome young male nurses who love butterscotch. (Jen Kirkman Quotes) I don’t like news channels so I have six websites that I check and I get the daily update (Jen Kirkman Quotes) I mean, I can’t say that I’ve had many deep thoughts because I traveled alone, but it’s good to be with myself in the quiet. (Jen Kirkman Quotes) For me, making any kind of resolution or saying, I’m doing this! can only cause pain, to get very deep. (Jen Kirkman Quotes) A lot of relationships have ended for me in my 20s, because I knew that eventually those people would wanna settle down and have kids. (Jen Kirkman Quotes) I don’t run around feeling infused with positivity, but I’ll have to be taking my last breath before I’ll admit I’m dying. So I’m either optimistic or in denial. (Jen Kirkman Quotes) Childfree women are actually great assets to the planet. Our carbon footprint is smaller than a mom’s! And we have enough money to write checks to organizations that help kids get vaccinations, vitamins, and educations yet have plenty of free time to advise your daughter that one day she will regret piercing her lip. (Jen Kirkman Quotes) Sometimes I look [ on trolls on Twitter], but even one ignorant comment can make me go, Oh god (Jen Kirkman Quotes) I don’t have that addictive, What’s going on? feeling anymore, thank God. (Jen Kirkman Quotes) I don’t do jokes about elections so that’s probably why it went okay for me, except for the crazy people that are hate-crime people. (Jen Kirkman Quotes) We have to get women’s stories out there so a guy will read it, laugh, and think, ‘I’m not laughing at a chick story but a story.’ (Jen Kirkman Quotes) Having a child is a lifetime commitment, the biggest one you can possibly make (Jen Kirkman Quotes) I rarely have out-of-town visitors because you have to do things like take them around L.A (Jen Kirkman Quotes) Couples without kids have each other, their friends, families, and Siri to talk to. It’s not like they’re quarantining themselves in an underground bunker, never to take a romantic stroll on the beach or attend a Morrissey concert ever again. They’re just using birth control. (Jen Kirkman Quotes) My joke is a picture of David Bowie on his balcony in the 70s in a suit in Paris, and unless that’s you, I’m not interested. There are very few aesthetic types that I have, and people who look like that are not always necessarily good for me (Jen Kirkman Quotes) Its almost Thanksgiving! A day when you get to hear your extended family use racial slurs for groups are not taking away their jobs (Jen Kirkman Quotes) I have this idyllic love life, but my mind just won’t accept that. I would like to bring a new guy home every night. I try to make humor out of that situation (Jen Kirkman Quotes)

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