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Jeremy Clarkson Quotes

I have had an amazingly fortunate life. I’m a child from Yorkshire, which is sort of like Cleveland without the pretty bits Picture Quote #1

Sometimes I stagger even myself with my genius Picture Quote #1

I’m having a nice cold pint and waiting for this to blow over Picture Quote #1

It was as relaxing as being tickled Picture Quote #1

If you’re thinking of coming to America, this is what it’s like: you’ve got your Comfort Inn, you’ve got your Best Western, and you’ve got your Red Lobster where you eat. Everybody’s very fat, everybody’s very stupid and everybody’s very rude - it’s not a holiday programme, it’s the truth Picture Quote #1

Because drug dealers shoot each other in London, Norfolk farmers can’t have guns to defend their homes. I mean, no one wants a gun - except at 4am when they hear a strange sound in the kitchen Picture Quote #1

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We live in the worst country in the world. At least we do for lazy, inefficient, office-bound police, whose response to an extraordinary rise in violent crime is to order more speed cameras Picture Quote #1

When I was 16, I wanted to look like Lord Byron. It’s not really a haircut so much as a hair-not-cut, but I’ve never changed it. It’s a bit Byron, a bit Don Juan DeMarco and other things that I aspire to be Picture Quote #1

You take out an injunction against somebody or some organisation and immediately news of that injunction and the people involved and the story behind the injunction is in a legal-free world on Twitter and the Internet. It’s pointless Picture Quote #1

Let’s be perfectly clear, shall we. The fox is not a little orange puppy dog with doe eyes and a waggly tail. It’s a disease-ridden wolf with the morals of a psychopath and the teeth of a great white shark Picture Quote #1

I mean its a weekly occurrence that somebody will complain that Top Gear was on last night - and you just sit back and wait for the complaints. But if you start to pay attention to everyones concerns, you end up with something bland and boring. So you sort of have to ignore everybody in order to do the show how we want to do it Picture Quote #1

I love Alfa Romeos and that [Alfa Romeo Giulia Quadrifoglio] was tremendous Picture Quote #1

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Think of it as Angelina Jolie. You’ve heard she’s mad and eats nothing but wallpaper paste. But you would, wouldn’t you? Picture Quote #1

...it seemed appropriate that I should develop some kind of illness. This is a good idea when you are at a loose end because everything, up to and including herpes, is better than being bored Picture Quote #1

The problem is that television executives have got it into their heads that if one presenter on a show is a blonde-haired, blue-eyed heterosexual boy, the other must be a black Muslim lesbian Picture Quote #1

If you were to buy a [BMW] 6-series, I recommend you select reverse when leaving friends’ houses so they don’t see its backside Picture Quote #1

I like to be loved by my children, and I quite like the ‘Guardian’ hating me. I like it when I read they want me to die painfully. Then I think I’ve really got under their skin. It’s like annoying a teacher. Once they’ve shown signs of weakness, you really can go for them Picture Quote #1

Telling people at a dinner party you drive a Nissan Almera is like telling them you’ve got the Ebola virus and you’re about to sneeze Picture Quote #1

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If a football official were to call for a slow-motion replay every time Didier Drogba fell over, each match would last about six weeks Picture Quote #1

Multi-tasking is the ability to screw everything up simultaneously Picture Quote #1

I don't think I am particularly funny. In fact, I know I'm not Picture Quote #1

Being smarter than you look is better than looking smarter than you are Picture Quote #1

Column writing is like gas - it fills the available space Picture Quote #1

All this health and safety talk is just killing me Picture Quote #1

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The Suzuki Wagon R should be avoided like unprotected sex with an Ethiopian transvestite Picture Quote #1

Speed has never killed anyone. Suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you Picture Quote #1

international hand of friendship. A cigarette Picture Quote #1

Americans are good at herding Bison. The end Picture Quote #1

I'd like to consider Ferrari as a scaled down version of God Picture Quote #1

I don't often agree with the RSPCA as I believe it is an animal's duty to be on my plate at supper time Picture Quote #1

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Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

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Text Quotes

I have had an amazingly fortunate life. I’m a child from Yorkshire, which is sort of like Cleveland without the pretty bits. (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) Sometimes I stagger even myself with my genius (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) I’m having a nice cold pint and waiting for this to blow over (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) It was as relaxing as being tickled (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) If you’re thinking of coming to America, this is what it’s like: you’ve got your Comfort Inn, you’ve got your Best Western, and you’ve got your Red Lobster where you eat. Everybody’s very fat, everybody’s very stupid and everybody’s very rude - it’s not a holiday programme, it’s the truth (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) Because drug dealers shoot each other in London, Norfolk farmers can’t have guns to defend their homes. I mean, no one wants a gun - except at 4am when they hear a strange sound in the kitchen (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) We live in the worst country in the world. At least we do for lazy, inefficient, office-bound police, whose response to an extraordinary rise in violent crime is to order more speed cameras (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) When I was 16, I wanted to look like Lord Byron. It’s not really a haircut so much as a hair-not-cut, but I’ve never changed it. It’s a bit Byron, a bit Don Juan DeMarco and other things that I aspire to be (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) You take out an injunction against somebody or some organisation and immediately news of that injunction and the people involved and the story behind the injunction is in a legal-free world on Twitter and the Internet. It’s pointless (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) Let’s be perfectly clear, shall we. The fox is not a little orange puppy dog with doe eyes and a waggly tail. It’s a disease-ridden wolf with the morals of a psychopath and the teeth of a great white shark (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) I mean its a weekly occurrence that somebody will complain that Top Gear was on last night - and you just sit back and wait for the complaints. But if you start to pay attention to everyones concerns, you end up with something bland and boring. So you sort of have to ignore everybody in order to do the show how we want to do it (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) I love Alfa Romeos and that [Alfa Romeo Giulia Quadrifoglio] was tremendous (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) Think of it as Angelina Jolie. You’ve heard she’s mad and eats nothing but wallpaper paste. But you would, wouldn’t you? (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) ...it seemed appropriate that I should develop some kind of illness. This is a good idea when you are at a loose end because everything, up to and including herpes, is better than being bored. (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) The problem is that television executives have got it into their heads that if one presenter on a show is a blonde-haired, blue-eyed heterosexual boy, the other must be a black Muslim lesbian. (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) If you were to buy a [BMW] 6-series, I recommend you select reverse when leaving friends’ houses so they don’t see its backside. (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) I like to be loved by my children, and I quite like the ‘Guardian’ hating me. I like it when I read they want me to die painfully. Then I think I’ve really got under their skin. It’s like annoying a teacher. Once they’ve shown signs of weakness, you really can go for them. (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) Telling people at a dinner party you drive a Nissan Almera is like telling them you’ve got the Ebola virus and you’re about to sneeze. (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) If a football official were to call for a slow-motion replay every time Didier Drogba fell over, each match would last about six weeks. (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) Multi-tasking is the ability to screw everything up simultaneously (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) I don't think I am particularly funny. In fact, I know I'm not (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) Being smarter than you look is better than looking smarter than you are (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) Column writing is like gas - it fills the available space (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) All this health and safety talk is just killing me (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) The Suzuki Wagon R should be avoided like unprotected sex with an Ethiopian transvestite (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) Speed has never killed anyone. Suddenly becoming stationary, that's what gets you (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) international hand of friendship. A cigarette (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) Americans are good at herding Bison. The end (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) I'd like to consider Ferrari as a scaled down version of God (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes) I don't often agree with the RSPCA as I believe it is an animal's duty to be on my plate at supper time (Jeremy Clarkson Quotes)

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