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Joke Quotes

I’m not good at telling a joke, but I can say a line in a certain way that makes people uncomfortable because they don’t know whether to laugh or not, and I love that comedy Picture Quote #1

I watch children a great deal; their idea is that rules are always negotiable, whereas you absolutely cannot joke at the airport about your toothpaste, and you cannot rollerblade in Grand Central Station. I keep running up against these things Picture Quote #1

I love doing great entertainment, but I like the joke to be on me. I don’t want to take advantage of some poor person and dog ‘em out and let the chips fall Picture Quote #1

Matter of fact, the way we got a path, a great friend, Arlen Specter, I convinced him to switch parties. Not a joke. Not a joke. He was the deciding vote Picture Quote #1

I come from a town of great musicians: Washington, D.C. It’s no joke, that history Picture Quote #1

I’m not a great joke writer, which is odd for a comic to say, but I’m not Picture Quote #1

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It’s very interesting, the joke comes first and then the wording comes within five seconds, maybe ten seconds. My thing is to get the joke across in as few words as possible. However, sometimes a word that’s not really needed does help the rhythm of it. It’s a gut feeling Picture Quote #1

I still think people do have racial hang-ups, but I think one of the reasons I can joke about it is people are shedding those racial hatreds Picture Quote #1

I even get tired performing standup, which is normally a low-impact exercise in futility but looks hard the way I do it. That’s why I take a lot of breaks, often stopping in the middle of a joke to catch my breath, or blame the crowd for not laughing before the punchline Picture Quote #1

You don’t have to think really hard to get the joke. I think humor in general appeals to all people Picture Quote #1

Tell people the truth, they laugh. The truth is so tragic they have to pretend it’s a joke Picture Quote #1

If you can’t joke about the most horrendous things in the world, what’s the point of jokes? What’s the point in having humor? Humor is to get us over terrible things Picture Quote #1

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Homework’s hard. Especially math. My kids joke with me. They tell me they have homework. I say, ‘Okay.’ And then I sit down and they say, ‘It’s math.’ ‘No! Not math! English, history, anything!’ Picture Quote #1

If I just do everything the opposite of what my dad did, I think that will make things pretty easy. I can joke about it now because I’m past that stage where it used to hurt. By having a kid, it’s gone. I could take all that negative energy that I had and put it in a positive way Picture Quote #1

My first manager, he had left Germany when he was five, but he would joke about the Nazis. And I’d laugh, but I’d look at him, and he was the first one who told me, ‘You know, funny is a powerful thing; it’s a wonderful weapon.’ Picture Quote #1

I often joke that 100 years from now I hope people are saying, ‘Dang, she looks good for her age!’ Picture Quote #1

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Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

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Text Quotes

I’m not good at telling a joke, but I can say a line in a certain way that makes people uncomfortable because they don’t know whether to laugh or not, and I love that comedy. (Joke Quotes) I watch children a great deal; their idea is that rules are always negotiable, whereas you absolutely cannot joke at the airport about your toothpaste, and you cannot rollerblade in Grand Central Station. I keep running up against these things. (Joke Quotes) I love doing great entertainment, but I like the joke to be on me. I don’t want to take advantage of some poor person and dog ‘em out and let the chips fall. (Joke Quotes) Matter of fact, the way we got a path, a great friend, Arlen Specter, I convinced him to switch parties. Not a joke. Not a joke. He was the deciding vote. (Joke Quotes) I come from a town of great musicians: Washington, D.C. It’s no joke, that history. (Joke Quotes) I’m not a great joke writer, which is odd for a comic to say, but I’m not (Joke Quotes) It’s very interesting, the joke comes first and then the wording comes within five seconds, maybe ten seconds. My thing is to get the joke across in as few words as possible. However, sometimes a word that’s not really needed does help the rhythm of it. It’s a gut feeling. (Joke Quotes) I still think people do have racial hang-ups, but I think one of the reasons I can joke about it is people are shedding those racial hatreds. (Joke Quotes) I even get tired performing standup, which is normally a low-impact exercise in futility but looks hard the way I do it. That’s why I take a lot of breaks, often stopping in the middle of a joke to catch my breath, or blame the crowd for not laughing before the punchline. (Joke Quotes) You don’t have to think really hard to get the joke. I think humor in general appeals to all people. (Joke Quotes) Tell people the truth, they laugh. The truth is so tragic they have to pretend it’s a joke. (Joke Quotes) If you can’t joke about the most horrendous things in the world, what’s the point of jokes? What’s the point in having humor? Humor is to get us over terrible things. (Joke Quotes) Homework’s hard. Especially math. My kids joke with me. They tell me they have homework. I say, ‘Okay.’ And then I sit down and they say, ‘It’s math.’ ‘No! Not math! English, history, anything!’ (Joke Quotes) If I just do everything the opposite of what my dad did, I think that will make things pretty easy. I can joke about it now because I’m past that stage where it used to hurt. By having a kid, it’s gone. I could take all that negative energy that I had and put it in a positive way. (Joke Quotes) My first manager, he had left Germany when he was five, but he would joke about the Nazis. And I’d laugh, but I’d look at him, and he was the first one who told me, ‘You know, funny is a powerful thing; it’s a wonderful weapon.’ (Joke Quotes) I often joke that 100 years from now I hope people are saying, ‘Dang, she looks good for her age!’ (Joke Quotes)

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