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Norm MacDonald Quotes

I don’t really like politics that much. And I like the order and simplicity of sports. They have an ending. You can argue with your friends about it, but in the end you still like sports. I almost love the fantasy world of sports more than the real world Picture Quote #1

I’m no good at anything but comedy, which I think I’m good at. I’m absolutely no good at networking; I’m terrible at acting; I’m terrible at dealing with executives; I’m terrible at collaborating. And I say whatever I want to say. But I think I’m good enough at comedy that I can survive. And I don’t really have an ambition for money Picture Quote #1

I watch political shows for a number of weeks in a row, and all I see are guys arguing with each other over issues I have no idea about. My brother, he loves war-torn places. My dad would always read the paper and tell me I should watch CNN, but I usually wind up watching ‘Breaking Bad.’ Picture Quote #1

I don’t know the difference between a hippie and a hipster but, it’s fun to watch either one of them get beat up Picture Quote #1

In terms of merit, sports has mathematical statistics. That’s how you know who the best player is Picture Quote #1

I have a little bit of an out-of-body experience where I enjoy the scenario, and I really do like seeing a crowd turn into a mob, and I do nothing to stop it. People can become really dangerous Picture Quote #1

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When I hear a guy lost a battle to cancer, that really did bother me, that that’s a term. It implies that he failed and that somebody else that defeated cancer is heroic and courageous Picture Quote #1

You know, with Hitler, the more I learn about that guy, the more I don’t care for him Picture Quote #1

I don’t care for sex. I find it an embarrassing, dull exercise. I prefer sports, where you can win Picture Quote #1

You ever see ‘The Dating Game’? That’s a weird game show. The prize on that show: another contestant. Talk about cheap Picture Quote #1

Kenny G has a Christmas album out this year. Hey, happy birthday Jesus! Hope you like crap! Picture Quote #1

All my life’s about is cracking up people and them cracking me up and trying not to think about dying. That doesn’t cost very much money Picture Quote #1

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My dad died, and my grandfather died, and my great-grandfather died. And the guy before him, I don’t know. Probably died Picture Quote #1

Actually, with those dirty movies, I find like, they’re good for about fifteen, twenty minutes. I’m really interested. And, then, uh, there’s one point, that all of a sudden I’m bored. You know? I just lose interest completely and I feel deeply ashamed Picture Quote #1

I’d say Jon Stewart has remained funny the entire time. Jon always makes it funny first. And he’s just, he’s talking about serious things, but in a funny way. Other comedians will talk about serious things in a serious way, and then you don’t know what’s going on Picture Quote #1

I like the order and simplicity of sports. They have an ending. You can argue with your friends about it, but in the end, you still like sports. I almost love the fantasy world of sports more than the real world Picture Quote #1

The Rolling Stones reunited for a twenty-fifth anniversary tour last week. Keith Richards said that he’s happy to continue to do what he’s been doing for the past twenty-five years: cheating death Picture Quote #1

Your worst and most dangerous enemy is the person that injures you under the pretensions of friendship Picture Quote #1

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I’ve just seen really, really funny guys, and if I didn’t know them, I wouldn’t know they were funny from the television. I don’t know what it does, it just sucks it away Picture Quote #1

Compared to politics, I think sports is funnier, because it’s inconsequential. And politics can be real important and all that. The more pointless something is, the funnier it is, you know? Picture Quote #1

Compared to politics, I think sports is funnier, because it’s inconsequential. And politics can be real important and all that. The more pointless something is, the funnier it is, you know? And the more grave or important things are... You know, some comedians can get this disease where they get serious all the time Picture Quote #1

You ever be having a really good dream, and then, uh- right in the middle of the dream you wake up, right in the best part of the dream? And there you are, back in your stinkin’ life again? Man, that’s rough, eh? Picture Quote #1

Generally I don’t like traveling around saying the exact same thing. I don’t think that’s a very good thing to do with your life Picture Quote #1

You’re trying your best to make people laugh; then if you fail, they hate you. But your intent’s the same. It’s not like you’re trying to do evil to them Picture Quote #1

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[Televised stand-up] never really makes me laugh. The only one I ever saw that I liked was Richard Pryor, and that was [shot on] film Picture Quote #1

I think clever people think that poor people are stupid Picture Quote #1

I don’t know anything about politics. Like, zero. Nothing Picture Quote #1

I never do impressions, but I probably should. People like that stuff Picture Quote #1

I never had any interest in sitcoms or motion pictures or anything like that Picture Quote #1

You can’t love your team without hating another team Picture Quote #1

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Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

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Text Quotes

I don’t really like politics that much. And I like the order and simplicity of sports. They have an ending. You can argue with your friends about it, but in the end you still like sports. I almost love the fantasy world of sports more than the real world. (Norm MacDonald Quotes) I’m no good at anything but comedy, which I think I’m good at. I’m absolutely no good at networking; I’m terrible at acting; I’m terrible at dealing with executives; I’m terrible at collaborating. And I say whatever I want to say. But I think I’m good enough at comedy that I can survive. And I don’t really have an ambition for money. (Norm MacDonald Quotes) I watch political shows for a number of weeks in a row, and all I see are guys arguing with each other over issues I have no idea about. My brother, he loves war-torn places. My dad would always read the paper and tell me I should watch CNN, but I usually wind up watching ‘Breaking Bad.’ (Norm MacDonald Quotes) I don’t know the difference between a hippie and a hipster but, it’s fun to watch either one of them get beat up. (Norm MacDonald Quotes) In terms of merit, sports has mathematical statistics. That’s how you know who the best player is. (Norm MacDonald Quotes) I have a little bit of an out-of-body experience where I enjoy the scenario, and I really do like seeing a crowd turn into a mob, and I do nothing to stop it. People can become really dangerous. (Norm MacDonald Quotes) When I hear a guy lost a battle to cancer, that really did bother me, that that’s a term. It implies that he failed and that somebody else that defeated cancer is heroic and courageous. (Norm MacDonald Quotes) You know, with Hitler, the more I learn about that guy, the more I don’t care for him (Norm MacDonald Quotes) I don’t care for sex. I find it an embarrassing, dull exercise. I prefer sports, where you can win. (Norm MacDonald Quotes) You ever see ‘The Dating Game’? That’s a weird game show. The prize on that show: another contestant. Talk about cheap. (Norm MacDonald Quotes) Kenny G has a Christmas album out this year. Hey, happy birthday Jesus! Hope you like crap! (Norm MacDonald Quotes) All my life’s about is cracking up people and them cracking me up and trying not to think about dying. That doesn’t cost very much money. (Norm MacDonald Quotes) My dad died, and my grandfather died, and my great-grandfather died. And the guy before him, I don’t know. Probably died. (Norm MacDonald Quotes) Actually, with those dirty movies, I find like, they’re good for about fifteen, twenty minutes. I’m really interested. And, then, uh, there’s one point, that all of a sudden I’m bored. You know? I just lose interest completely and I feel deeply ashamed. (Norm MacDonald Quotes) I’d say Jon Stewart has remained funny the entire time. Jon always makes it funny first. And he’s just, he’s talking about serious things, but in a funny way. Other comedians will talk about serious things in a serious way, and then you don’t know what’s going on. (Norm MacDonald Quotes) I like the order and simplicity of sports. They have an ending. You can argue with your friends about it, but in the end, you still like sports. I almost love the fantasy world of sports more than the real world. (Norm MacDonald Quotes) The Rolling Stones reunited for a twenty-fifth anniversary tour last week. Keith Richards said that he’s happy to continue to do what he’s been doing for the past twenty-five years: cheating death. (Norm MacDonald Quotes) Your worst and most dangerous enemy is the person that injures you under the pretensions of friendship. (Norm MacDonald Quotes) I’ve just seen really, really funny guys, and if I didn’t know them, I wouldn’t know they were funny from the television. I don’t know what it does, it just sucks it away. (Norm MacDonald Quotes) Compared to politics, I think sports is funnier, because it’s inconsequential. And politics can be real important and all that. The more pointless something is, the funnier it is, you know? (Norm MacDonald Quotes) Compared to politics, I think sports is funnier, because it’s inconsequential. And politics can be real important and all that. The more pointless something is, the funnier it is, you know? And the more grave or important things are... You know, some comedians can get this disease where they get serious all the time. (Norm MacDonald Quotes) You ever be having a really good dream, and then, uh- right in the middle of the dream you wake up, right in the best part of the dream? And there you are, back in your stinkin’ life again? Man, that’s rough, eh? (Norm MacDonald Quotes) Generally I don’t like traveling around saying the exact same thing. I don’t think that’s a very good thing to do with your life. (Norm MacDonald Quotes) You’re trying your best to make people laugh; then if you fail, they hate you. But your intent’s the same. It’s not like you’re trying to do evil to them. (Norm MacDonald Quotes) [Televised stand-up] never really makes me laugh. The only one I ever saw that I liked was Richard Pryor, and that was [shot on] film. (Norm MacDonald Quotes) I think clever people think that poor people are stupid (Norm MacDonald Quotes) I don’t know anything about politics. Like, zero. Nothing (Norm MacDonald Quotes) I never do impressions, but I probably should. People like that stuff (Norm MacDonald Quotes) I never had any interest in sitcoms or motion pictures or anything like that (Norm MacDonald Quotes) You can’t love your team without hating another team (Norm MacDonald Quotes)

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