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Rob Delaney Quotes

I love gay people. Or as I sometimes call them, ‘people.’ Picture Quote #1

Running is special. We’ve all done it: well, poorly, focused, in fear, being pursued, toward a goal. It’s just elemental. Running is like fire Picture Quote #1

I can’t ‘make’ you love me. But I can fill my pantry with your favourite snacks and offer you a weekly stipend of $75 Picture Quote #1

Depression taught me the importance of compassion and hard work, and that you can overcome enormous obstacles Picture Quote #1

But I also know in standup, there’s nowhere to hide. You get on stage and you deliver, or you are eviscerated and you are thrown into a pile of bodies at the bottom of a mountain Picture Quote #1

I’m crazy about Shakespeare, who was a notorious word inventor. And my wife is an English teacher, and she’s hilarious Picture Quote #1

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Well, Mitt Romney is a very attractive comedic target. He’s irresistible to me. I mean, seriously, I want to pay less attention to him Picture Quote #1

The danger for a comedian on Twitter is the same danger that any civilian faces: sometimes you gotta put that phone down and go live your life. When you’re on Twitter, you’re not living, and if you’re not living, you’re not taking in stimuli with which you can create new material Picture Quote #1

I think your ambition for something changes as you go Picture Quote #1

I’m a comedian at the beginning and the end of the day. I’m not affiliated with any campaign, nor do I generally find politics interesting enough to plan to be involved Picture Quote #1

Don’t even FRONT like you love your family, America, or God, if you don’t have a DETAILED and REHEARSED Black Friday tactical shopping plan Picture Quote #1

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The best thing you can do when you’re not feeling funny is go out and get more stimuli from the world, get out and walk around, read a book, go talk to some birds or a dog and replenish the well, as it were Picture Quote #1

Politicians, it’s in their job description to just lie, every day Picture Quote #1

In real life, I am alarmingly boring Picture Quote #1

In high school, I definitely fancied myself an intense guy, which is so lame Picture Quote #1

I hate wearing suits and ties Picture Quote #1

I no longer believe in freedom of speech Picture Quote #1

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If you have an opinion on what other adults do consensually with other adults when they take their pants off, you’re a weirdo Picture Quote #1

People who concern themselves with the rights of other adults who engage in consensual acts involving sex, love, and/or eating croissants together are damaged and in pain Picture Quote #1

It’s probably not love if you don’t press your face to the toilet seat after they’ve used it to feel their warmth Picture Quote #1

People moved in across the street and are immediately cutting down a huge tree. Their toothbrushes will know my buttonhole Picture Quote #1

The best thing you can do when you’re not feeling funny is go out and get more stimuli from the world, get out and walk around, read a book, go talk to some birds or a dog and replenish the well, as it were Picture Quote #1

I’m a comedian at the beginning and the end of the day. I’m not affiliated with any campaign, nor do I generally find politics interesting enough to plan to be involved Picture Quote #1

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I was an extroverted kid and performed, like, acting and singing. Then, the older I got, I realized I enjoyed performing things that I came up with myself more and I enjoyed making people laugh more than making people cry or think Picture Quote #1

I’m endlessly fascinated by parenting, marriage, my wife and the ins and outs of marriage Picture Quote #1

Running is special. We’ve all done it: well, poorly, focused, in fear, being pursued, toward a goal. It’s just elemental. Running is like fire Picture Quote #1

Cats probably wouldn’t need 9 lives if they wore tiny little helmets and didn’t smoke cigarettes Picture Quote #1

Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

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Text Quotes

I love gay people. Or as I sometimes call them, ‘people.’ (Rob Delaney Quotes) Running is special. We’ve all done it: well, poorly, focused, in fear, being pursued, toward a goal. It’s just elemental. Running is like fire. (Rob Delaney Quotes) I can’t ‘make’ you love me. But I can fill my pantry with your favourite snacks and offer you a weekly stipend of $75 (Rob Delaney Quotes) Depression taught me the importance of compassion and hard work, and that you can overcome enormous obstacles (Rob Delaney Quotes) But I also know in standup, there’s nowhere to hide. You get on stage and you deliver, or you are eviscerated and you are thrown into a pile of bodies at the bottom of a mountain (Rob Delaney Quotes) I’m crazy about Shakespeare, who was a notorious word inventor. And my wife is an English teacher, and she’s hilarious (Rob Delaney Quotes) Well, Mitt Romney is a very attractive comedic target. He’s irresistible to me. I mean, seriously, I want to pay less attention to him (Rob Delaney Quotes) The danger for a comedian on Twitter is the same danger that any civilian faces: sometimes you gotta put that phone down and go live your life. When you’re on Twitter, you’re not living, and if you’re not living, you’re not taking in stimuli with which you can create new material (Rob Delaney Quotes) I think your ambition for something changes as you go (Rob Delaney Quotes) I’m a comedian at the beginning and the end of the day. I’m not affiliated with any campaign, nor do I generally find politics interesting enough to plan to be involved. (Rob Delaney Quotes) Don’t even FRONT like you love your family, America, or God, if you don’t have a DETAILED and REHEARSED Black Friday tactical shopping plan. (Rob Delaney Quotes) Comedians who are 22 years old can certainly be funny and clever, and be capable of telling jokes - but are they talking about their favorite TV shows, or a particular brand of shampoo? (Rob Delaney Quotes) The best thing you can do when you’re not feeling funny is go out and get more stimuli from the world, get out and walk around, read a book, go talk to some birds or a dog and replenish the well, as it were. (Rob Delaney Quotes) Politicians, it’s in their job description to just lie, every day (Rob Delaney Quotes) In real life, I am alarmingly boring (Rob Delaney Quotes) In high school, I definitely fancied myself an intense guy, which is so lame (Rob Delaney Quotes) I hate wearing suits and ties (Rob Delaney Quotes) I no longer believe in freedom of speech (Rob Delaney Quotes) If you have an opinion on what other adults do consensually with other adults when they take their pants off, you’re a weirdo (Rob Delaney Quotes) People who concern themselves with the rights of other adults who engage in consensual acts involving sex, love, and/or eating croissants together are damaged and in pain (Rob Delaney Quotes) It’s probably not love if you don’t press your face to the toilet seat after they’ve used it to feel their warmth (Rob Delaney Quotes) People moved in across the street and are immediately cutting down a huge tree. Their toothbrushes will know my buttonhole (Rob Delaney Quotes) The best thing you can do when you’re not feeling funny is go out and get more stimuli from the world, get out and walk around, read a book, go talk to some birds or a dog and replenish the well, as it were (Rob Delaney Quotes) I’m a comedian at the beginning and the end of the day. I’m not affiliated with any campaign, nor do I generally find politics interesting enough to plan to be involved (Rob Delaney Quotes) I was an extroverted kid and performed, like, acting and singing. Then, the older I got, I realized I enjoyed performing things that I came up with myself more and I enjoyed making people laugh more than making people cry or think (Rob Delaney Quotes) I’m endlessly fascinated by parenting, marriage, my wife and the ins and outs of marriage (Rob Delaney Quotes) Running is special. We’ve all done it: well, poorly, focused, in fear, being pursued, toward a goal. It’s just elemental. Running is like fire (Rob Delaney Quotes) Cats probably wouldn’t need 9 lives if they wore tiny little helmets and didn’t smoke cigarettes (Rob Delaney Quotes)