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Ron Swanson Quotes

Am I interrupting anything important? Impossible, I work for the government Picture Quote #1

I can't go because I don't want to Picture Quote #1

You had me at meat tornado Picture Quote #1

Crying: Acceptable at funerals and the Grand Canyon Picture Quote #1

I'm a simple man. I like pretty, dark-haired women and breakfast food Picture Quote #1

Capitalism: God's way of determining who is smart and who is poor Picture Quote #1

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I like Tom. He doesn't do a lot of work around here. He shows zero initiative. He's not a team player. He's never one to go that extra mile. Tom is exactly what I'm looking for in a government employee Picture Quote #1

If any of you need anything at all.. too bad. Deal with your problems yourselves like adults Picture Quote #1

I need anyone with a pulse and a brain to pitch in. Hey, Ron, do you need help with anything? No, we're good, thanks. In fact, you can head home early Picture Quote #1

I've had the same will since I was 8 years old. Upon my death all of my belongings shall transfer to the man or animal who has killed me. What are these weird symbols? The man who kills me will know Picture Quote #1

The whole point of this country is, if you want to eat garbage, balloon up to 600 pounds and die of a heart attack at 43, you can. You are free to do so. To me, that's beautiful Picture Quote #1

I have been forced to do many things I don't enjoy, like write things down and speak with people Picture Quote #1

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You're stranded on a desert island, what is the one thing you bring with you? Silence Picture Quote #1

You are such a sore loser. I am not a sore loser, it's just that I prefer to win and when I don't, I get furious Picture Quote #1

There has never been a sadness that can’t be cured by breakfast food Picture Quote #1

Really? You're not scared to eat here? When I eat, it is the food that is scared Picture Quote #1

When people get a little too chummy with me I like to call them by the wrong name to let them know I don't really care about hem Picture Quote #1

Hi there, is there a project I can help you with today? I know more than you Picture Quote #1

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Turf and turf. It's a 16 ounce T-bone and a 24-ounce Porterhouse. Also, whiskey and a cigar Picture Quote #1

Under my tutelage, you will grow from boys to men. From men into gladiators. And from gladiators into Swansons Picture Quote #1

That's not really the attitude I expect from an award-winner. Everything I do is the attitude of an award-winner, because I have won an award Picture Quote #1

The government is a greedy piglet that suckles on a taxpayer's teat until they have sore, chapped nipples Picture Quote #1

I'd wish you the best of luck. But I believe luck is a concept created by the weak to explain their failures Picture Quote #1

I came here for the same reason people go to the zoo. Shhh, look at that thing. Nature is amazing Picture Quote #1

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Just give me all the bacon and eggs you have. Wait, wait. I worry what you just heard was

And I'll have the number eight. That's a party platter, it serves 12 people. I know what I'm about son Picture Quote #1

Do you have any history of mental illness in your family. I have an uncle who does yoga Picture Quote #1

I work hard to make sure my department is as small and as ineffective as possible Picture Quote #1

You've fallen into a classic trap: Trying to fix a woman's problems instead of just listening to what they are Picture Quote #1

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Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

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Text Quotes

Am I interrupting anything important? Impossible, I work for the government (Ron Swanson Quotes) I can't go because I don't want to (Ron Swanson Quotes) You had me at meat tornado (Ron Swanson Quotes) Crying: Acceptable at funerals and the Grand Canyon (Ron Swanson Quotes) I'm a simple man. I like pretty, dark-haired women and breakfast food (Ron Swanson Quotes) Capitalism: God's way of determining who is smart and who is poor (Ron Swanson Quotes) I like Tom. He doesn't do a lot of work around here. He shows zero initiative. He's not a team player. He's never one to go that extra mile. Tom is exactly what I'm looking for in a government employee (Ron Swanson Quotes) If any of you need anything at all.. too bad. Deal with your problems yourselves like adults (Ron Swanson Quotes) I need anyone with a pulse and a brain to pitch in. Hey, Ron, do you need help with anything? No, we're good, thanks. In fact, you can head home early (Ron Swanson Quotes) I've had the same will since I was 8 years old. Upon my death all of my belongings shall transfer to the man or animal who has killed me. What are these weird symbols? The man who kills me will know (Ron Swanson Quotes) The whole point of this country is, if you want to eat garbage, balloon up to 600 pounds and die of a heart attack at 43, you can. You are free to do so. To me, that's beautiful (Ron Swanson Quotes) I have been forced to do many things I don't enjoy, like write things down and speak with people (Ron Swanson Quotes) You're stranded on a desert island, what is the one thing you bring with you? Silence (Ron Swanson Quotes) You are such a sore loser. I am not a sore loser, it's just that I prefer to win and when I don't, I get furious (Ron Swanson Quotes) There has never been a sadness that can’t be cured by breakfast food (Ron Swanson Quotes) Really? You're not scared to eat here? When I eat, it is the food that is scared (Ron Swanson Quotes) When people get a little too chummy with me I like to call them by the wrong name to let them know I don't really care about hem (Ron Swanson Quotes) Hi there, is there a project I can help you with today? I know more than you (Ron Swanson Quotes) Turf and turf. It's a 16 ounce T-bone and a 24-ounce Porterhouse. Also, whiskey and a cigar (Ron Swanson Quotes) Under my tutelage, you will grow from boys to men. From men into gladiators. And from gladiators into Swansons (Ron Swanson Quotes) That's not really the attitude I expect from an award-winner. Everything I do is the attitude of an award-winner, because I have won an award (Ron Swanson Quotes) The government is a greedy piglet that suckles on a taxpayer's teat until they have sore, chapped nipples (Ron Swanson Quotes) I'd wish you the best of luck. But I believe luck is a concept created by the weak to explain their failures (Ron Swanson Quotes) I came here for the same reason people go to the zoo. Shhh, look at that thing. Nature is amazing (Ron Swanson Quotes) Just give me all the bacon and eggs you have. Wait, wait. I worry what you just heard was "Give me a lot of bacon and eggs." What I said was, "Give me all the bacon and eggs you have." Do you understand? (Ron Swanson Quotes) And I'll have the number eight. That's a party platter, it serves 12 people. I know what I'm about son (Ron Swanson Quotes) Do you have any history of mental illness in your family. I have an uncle who does yoga (Ron Swanson Quotes) I work hard to make sure my department is as small and as ineffective as possible (Ron Swanson Quotes) You've fallen into a classic trap: Trying to fix a woman's problems instead of just listening to what they are (Ron Swanson Quotes)

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