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Stephen Colbert Quotes

Folks, I don’t trust children. They’re here to replace us Picture Quote #1

I scream, you scream, we all scream... for the truth Picture Quote #1

Warmth is to sun, as truth is to me Picture Quote #1

Keep your facts, I’m going with the truth Picture Quote #1

Agnostics are just atheists without balls Picture Quote #1

Contrary to what people may say, there’s no upper limit to stupidity Picture Quote #1

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Why would we go to war on women? They don’t have any oil Picture Quote #1

An apple a day keeps anyone away, if you throw it hard enough Picture Quote #1

Asia: Four little letters, three billion little people Picture Quote #1

Today, folks, should be all about love. Unless you’re old Picture Quote #1

I have always been a fan of reality by majority vote Picture Quote #1

Everybody loves dogs. They’re the pizza of the animal kingdom Picture Quote #1

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There’s a buzz to failing and not dying Picture Quote #1

If someone spreads hate then they’re not your religious leader Picture Quote #1

You have a firm grasp of the obvious Picture Quote #1

Laughter brings the swelling down on our national psyche Picture Quote #1

I’m a huge news junkie. I love what the news does Picture Quote #1

Status is always ripe for satire, status is always good for comedy Picture Quote #1

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I think of him as well intentioned, poorly informed, high status idiot Picture Quote #1

Well, I thought it was funny Picture Quote #1

I just think Rosa Parks was overrated. Last time I checked, she got famous for breaking the law Picture Quote #1

In order to be a top - tier candidate, I need 7. 5 million dollars, and I currently have 0. 0 million dollars Picture Quote #1

In order to maintain an untenable position, you have to be actively ignorant. One motto on the show is, ‘Keep your facts, I’m going with the truth.’ Picture Quote #1

We claim no respectability. There’s no status I would not surrender for a joke. So we don’t have to defend anything Picture Quote #1

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I didn’t realize quite how liberal I was until I was asked to make passionate comedic choices as opposed to necessarily successful comedic choices Picture Quote #1

Not living in fear is a great gift, because certainly these days we do it so much. And do you know what I like about comedy? You can’t laugh and be afraid at the same time - of anything. If you’re laughing, I defy you to be afraid Picture Quote #1

Winning the Nobel Prize does not automatically qualify you to be commander in chief. I think George Bush has proved definitively that to be president, you don’t need to care about science, literature or peace Picture Quote #1

It would be a very short pint. It would be gummy bears and matzah, and be called Chewy Jewy Picture Quote #1

Give a man a fish and he’ll eat for a day. Give a man a sub-prime fish loan and you’re in business, buddy! Picture Quote #1

Sir, pay no attention to the people who say the glass is half empty, because 32% means it’s 2/3 empty. There’s still some liquid in that glass is my point, but I wouldn’t drink it. The last third is usually backwash. (Said to President Bush at the White House Correspondents Dinner) Picture Quote #1

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Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

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Text Quotes

Folks, I don’t trust children. They’re here to replace us (Stephen Colbert Quotes) I scream, you scream, we all scream... for the truth (Stephen Colbert Quotes) Warmth is to sun, as truth is to me (Stephen Colbert Quotes) Keep your facts, I’m going with the truth (Stephen Colbert Quotes) Agnostics are just atheists without balls (Stephen Colbert Quotes) Contrary to what people may say, there’s no upper limit to stupidity (Stephen Colbert Quotes) Why would we go to war on women? They don’t have any oil (Stephen Colbert Quotes) An apple a day keeps anyone away, if you throw it hard enough (Stephen Colbert Quotes) Asia: Four little letters, three billion little people (Stephen Colbert Quotes) Today, folks, should be all about love. Unless you’re old (Stephen Colbert Quotes) I have always been a fan of reality by majority vote (Stephen Colbert Quotes) Everybody loves dogs. They’re the pizza of the animal kingdom (Stephen Colbert Quotes) There’s a buzz to failing and not dying (Stephen Colbert Quotes) If someone spreads hate then they’re not your religious leader (Stephen Colbert Quotes) You have a firm grasp of the obvious (Stephen Colbert Quotes) Laughter brings the swelling down on our national psyche (Stephen Colbert Quotes) I’m a huge news junkie. I love what the news does (Stephen Colbert Quotes) Status is always ripe for satire, status is always good for comedy (Stephen Colbert Quotes) I think of him as well intentioned, poorly informed, high status idiot (Stephen Colbert Quotes) Well, I thought it was funny (Stephen Colbert Quotes) I just think Rosa Parks was overrated. Last time I checked, she got famous for breaking the law (Stephen Colbert Quotes) In order to be a top - tier candidate, I need 7. 5 million dollars, and I currently have 0. 0 million dollars (Stephen Colbert Quotes) In order to maintain an untenable position, you have to be actively ignorant. One motto on the show is, ‘Keep your facts, I’m going with the truth.’ (Stephen Colbert Quotes) We claim no respectability. There’s no status I would not surrender for a joke. So we don’t have to defend anything (Stephen Colbert Quotes) I didn’t realize quite how liberal I was until I was asked to make passionate comedic choices as opposed to necessarily successful comedic choices (Stephen Colbert Quotes) Not living in fear is a great gift, because certainly these days we do it so much. And do you know what I like about comedy? You can’t laugh and be afraid at the same time - of anything. If you’re laughing, I defy you to be afraid (Stephen Colbert Quotes) Winning the Nobel Prize does not automatically qualify you to be commander in chief. I think George Bush has proved definitively that to be president, you don’t need to care about science, literature or peace (Stephen Colbert Quotes) It would be a very short pint. It would be gummy bears and matzah, and be called Chewy Jewy (Stephen Colbert Quotes) Give a man a fish and he’ll eat for a day. Give a man a sub-prime fish loan and you’re in business, buddy! (Stephen Colbert Quotes) Sir, pay no attention to the people who say the glass is half empty, because 32% means it’s 2/3 empty. There’s still some liquid in that glass is my point, but I wouldn’t drink it. The last third is usually backwash. (Said to President Bush at the White House Correspondents Dinner) (Stephen Colbert Quotes)

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