We seek our friend not sacredly, but with an adulterate passion which would appropriate him to ourselves

We seek our friend not sacredly, but with an adulterate passion which would appropriate him to ourselves

Ralph Waldo Emerson, a prominent American essayist, poet, and philosopher, often explored the complexities of human relationships and the nature of friendship in his works. In the quote “We seek our friend not sacredly, but with an adulterate passion which would appropriate him to ourselves,” Emerson delves into the idea that our pursuit of friendship is often tainted by selfish desires and a desire to possess or control the other person.

Emerson believed that true friendship should be based on mutual respect, understanding, and a genuine connection between individuals. However, he also recognized that human nature is inherently flawed, and our relationships are often influenced by our own desires and insecurities. In this quote, Emerson suggests that our pursuit of friendship is often driven by a selfish desire to make the other person conform to our own expectations and desires, rather than accepting them for who they truly are.

Emerson’s concept of seeking friendship “not sacredly” implies that we do not approach our relationships with a sense of reverence or respect for the other person’s individuality. Instead, we are motivated by a “adulterate passion” that seeks to possess or control the other person, rather than allowing them to be themselves. This can lead to a sense of possessiveness, jealousy, and manipulation in our relationships, as we try to mold our friends into the image of what we want them to be.

Emerson’s words serve as a reminder that true friendship should be based on honesty, authenticity, and a genuine desire to support and uplift the other person. When we approach our relationships with a sense of reverence and respect for the other person’s autonomy, we can cultivate deeper connections and create meaningful bonds that are based on mutual trust and understanding. By recognizing and overcoming our own selfish desires and insecurities, we can strive to seek friendship in a more sacred and authentic way, honoring the unique qualities and individuality of our friends.