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Zach Braff Quotes

You know, I’ve occasionally tried to watch other shows besides Scrubs, but comparing them is a bit like me competing in the special Olympics. Obviously I would win without contest, but the point is that they are trying their best Picture Quote #1

If you’re dumb enough to volunteer for the army, I don’t see why we’re supposed to feel so bad when you get shot. I’m not saying we should throw a party or anything, but is it such a tragedy? If I’d gotten shot before I made ‘Garden State’, yeah, that’s a tragedy, but some red-state hick getting his legs blown off? Come on Picture Quote #1

The only real difference between hookers, stippers, sluts and regualar women how many times you can hit them before they cry. Hookers can really take a punch, I’ll tell you that much Picture Quote #1

It’s... it’s such a weird thing. After Garden State, so many companies wanted to make my movies, and after The Last Kiss, I realized people would make anything I was in. As long as I keep this up I’ll be swimming in chubby indie girl pussy Picture Quote #1

People have always wondered what my opinion on Stevie Wonder is. I say if he’s so great how come he can’t see? I mean, God doesn’t make mistakes, just look at me for example Picture Quote #1

I like hot dogs. I like eggplant. I like pizza and creamed corn and beer. But I don’t like Arabs Picture Quote #1

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I’ve always tried to learn from the greats: Orson Welles, Humphrey Bogart, Ghandi, Buddha, Jesus... it’s just that there’s this tremendous pressure to correct all the things they got wrong Picture Quote #1

One time I considered making a video game about my life where people control a character called ‘Zach Braff’ and run around being awesome. Then I realized that getting to pretend to be me would be like shooting up heroin for anyone who played it, and I don’t want that on my conscience Picture Quote #1

Sometimes I regret not being Catholic. I think I’d make a pretty good saint Picture Quote #1

In my opinion, one of the biggest drawbacks about Sergio Leone films are the scores composed by Ennio Morricone. If [Leone] were as talented as I am, he would have made mixtapes for his movies instead of letting some schmuck write the soundtracks for him. But then if he were as talented as I am, he’d be Zach Braff. And have his own Grammy Picture Quote #1

Ya know, Hitler was this evil, evil man. But with the World Bank and Israel manipulating America, he might have been on to something Picture Quote #1

I never taught a blind/deaf chick to read, but somehow I’ve managed to turn Scrubs into a watchable show. That may not sound like much, but take a look at my surrounding cast and ask yourself, who’s the real miracle worker? Picture Quote #1

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The fact that ‘Scrubs’ is so popular in Israel is very important to me. I feel like I’m helping to cancel out the thousands of years of oppression the Jewish people have suffered Picture Quote #1

I can’t watch the news anymore. They have their priorities all out of whack. All I see is Natalee Holloway and Britney Spears and the war in Iraq. Where’s the substantive news? Where’s the Zach Braff coverage? Picture Quote #1

People still make New Year’s resolutions? Wow. I figured those were pointless once I perfected myself by directing, writing, and acting in Garden State. I guess it makes sense, though. It gives people a chance to hope that they can become as great as me someday Picture Quote #1

Well, I’m not saying that America is a bad place or anything. I just think 9/11 needed to happen sooner or later Picture Quote #1

I actually did ponder doing the Brad Pitt/Angelina Jolie thing and get a kid from Ethiopia. But you know, I already have an ashtray Picture Quote #1

When I think about the holidays, I think about the Salvation Army guys ringing bells in front of stores. They’re always so nice to you and they’re always willing to give a heart to heart conversation. They actually bear the winter cold to ask for your petty cash with a smile on their face. Fudge those guys Picture Quote #1

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People keep asking me whether I’m going to vote for Obama or McCain in the election. But I’m like, why bother? There will never be another leader as good as he was Picture Quote #1

I mean, so what if it’s a little dangerous? A one-armed kid is comedy gold Picture Quote #1

I think they’re bogus, honestly. How utter garbage like Crash and Million Dollar Baby can win best picture, where true works of art such as Garden State go untouched is beyond me. It just proves how close-minded America really is, and I refuse to take part in it Picture Quote #1

After all meat is meat. I don’t understand why so many people are bithing about it. It’s very healthy and contains lots of vitamins Picture Quote #1

They say that guys who like chick flicks tend to do a little better with the ladies. Well, I INVENTED the chick flick, so you can pretty much guess where that leaves me Picture Quote #1

Over half a century on and they’re still complaining about it. Compare it to the fact that Garden State didn’t win an Oscar and they seem a little petty if you ask me. I guess that just goes to show what kind of people they really are Picture Quote #1

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It’s trust issue more than anything. I mean, whats stopping them from teaming up, dressing up like a really tall person in a trenchcoat, and then BAM. They sneak out with all your furniture Picture Quote #1

I donno, it’s not impressive. Once I put ear plugs in and put a blind fold on for like 14 minutes and I did just fine Picture Quote #1

There is one person I can think of better than me. And that’s Zach Braff. What a cool guy Picture Quote #1

At this point I feel like I could go out and accomplish anything. I’d just love to see Will Smith’s face if he found out I, Z-Braff, have the number one rap album in the country. That’d show that no-talent uncle tom Picture Quote #1

I think there are bound to be obstacles in any path to success. I mean, I’m Jewish, and there’s nothing I can do about that. Instead of sitting around and feeling sorry for myself, I got over it and did something with my life Picture Quote #1

I think sports are very beneficial in the fight against obesity. I remember playing little league - I was the best person on the pitch by a long shot. It was only last weekend actually, I think I have some photos of it if you’re interested Picture Quote #1

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Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

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Text Quotes

You know, I’ve occasionally tried to watch other shows besides Scrubs, but comparing them is a bit like me competing in the special Olympics. Obviously I would win without contest, but the point is that they are trying their best (Zach Braff Quotes) If you’re dumb enough to volunteer for the army, I don’t see why we’re supposed to feel so bad when you get shot. I’m not saying we should throw a party or anything, but is it such a tragedy? If I’d gotten shot before I made ‘Garden State’, yeah, that’s a tragedy, but some red-state hick getting his legs blown off? Come on (Zach Braff Quotes) The only real difference between hookers, stippers, sluts and regualar women how many times you can hit them before they cry. Hookers can really take a punch, I’ll tell you that much (Zach Braff Quotes) It’s... it’s such a weird thing. After Garden State, so many companies wanted to make my movies, and after The Last Kiss, I realized people would make anything I was in. As long as I keep this up I’ll be swimming in chubby indie girl pussy (Zach Braff Quotes) People have always wondered what my opinion on Stevie Wonder is. I say if he’s so great how come he can’t see? I mean, God doesn’t make mistakes, just look at me for example (Zach Braff Quotes) I like hot dogs. I like eggplant. I like pizza and creamed corn and beer. But I don’t like Arabs (Zach Braff Quotes) I’ve always tried to learn from the greats: Orson Welles, Humphrey Bogart, Ghandi, Buddha, Jesus... it’s just that there’s this tremendous pressure to correct all the things they got wrong (Zach Braff Quotes) One time I considered making a video game about my life where people control a character called ‘Zach Braff’ and run around being awesome. Then I realized that getting to pretend to be me would be like shooting up heroin for anyone who played it, and I don’t want that on my conscience (Zach Braff Quotes) Sometimes I regret not being Catholic. I think I’d make a pretty good saint (Zach Braff Quotes) In my opinion, one of the biggest drawbacks about Sergio Leone films are the scores composed by Ennio Morricone. If [Leone] were as talented as I am, he would have made mixtapes for his movies instead of letting some schmuck write the soundtracks for him. But then if he were as talented as I am, he’d be Zach Braff. And have his own Grammy (Zach Braff Quotes) Ya know, Hitler was this evil, evil man. But with the World Bank and Israel manipulating America, he might have been on to something (Zach Braff Quotes) I never taught a blind/deaf chick to read, but somehow I’ve managed to turn Scrubs into a watchable show. That may not sound like much, but take a look at my surrounding cast and ask yourself, who’s the real miracle worker? (Zach Braff Quotes) The fact that ‘Scrubs’ is so popular in Israel is very important to me. I feel like I’m helping to cancel out the thousands of years of oppression the Jewish people have suffered (Zach Braff Quotes) I can’t watch the news anymore. They have their priorities all out of whack. All I see is Natalee Holloway and Britney Spears and the war in Iraq. Where’s the substantive news? Where’s the Zach Braff coverage? (Zach Braff Quotes) People still make New Year’s resolutions? Wow. I figured those were pointless once I perfected myself by directing, writing, and acting in Garden State. I guess it makes sense, though. It gives people a chance to hope that they can become as great as me someday (Zach Braff Quotes) Well, I’m not saying that America is a bad place or anything. I just think 9/11 needed to happen sooner or later (Zach Braff Quotes) I actually did ponder doing the Brad Pitt/Angelina Jolie thing and get a kid from Ethiopia. But you know, I already have an ashtray (Zach Braff Quotes) When I think about the holidays, I think about the Salvation Army guys ringing bells in front of stores. They’re always so nice to you and they’re always willing to give a heart to heart conversation. They actually bear the winter cold to ask for your petty cash with a smile on their face. Fudge those guys (Zach Braff Quotes) People keep asking me whether I’m going to vote for Obama or McCain in the election. But I’m like, why bother? There will never be another leader as good as he was (Zach Braff Quotes) I mean, so what if it’s a little dangerous? A one-armed kid is comedy gold (Zach Braff Quotes) I think they’re bogus, honestly. How utter garbage like Crash and Million Dollar Baby can win best picture, where true works of art such as Garden State go untouched is beyond me. It just proves how close-minded America really is, and I refuse to take part in it (Zach Braff Quotes) After all meat is meat. I don’t understand why so many people are bithing about it. It’s very healthy and contains lots of vitamins (Zach Braff Quotes) They say that guys who like chick flicks tend to do a little better with the ladies. Well, I INVENTED the chick flick, so you can pretty much guess where that leaves me (Zach Braff Quotes) Over half a century on and they’re still complaining about it. Compare it to the fact that Garden State didn’t win an Oscar and they seem a little petty if you ask me. I guess that just goes to show what kind of people they really are (Zach Braff Quotes) It’s trust issue more than anything. I mean, whats stopping them from teaming up, dressing up like a really tall person in a trenchcoat, and then BAM. They sneak out with all your furniture (Zach Braff Quotes) I donno, it’s not impressive. Once I put ear plugs in and put a blind fold on for like 14 minutes and I did just fine (Zach Braff Quotes) There is one person I can think of better than me. And that’s Zach Braff. What a cool guy (Zach Braff Quotes) At this point I feel like I could go out and accomplish anything. I’d just love to see Will Smith’s face if he found out I, Z-Braff, have the number one rap album in the country. That’d show that no-talent uncle tom (Zach Braff Quotes) I think there are bound to be obstacles in any path to success. I mean, I’m Jewish, and there’s nothing I can do about that. Instead of sitting around and feeling sorry for myself, I got over it and did something with my life (Zach Braff Quotes) I think sports are very beneficial in the fight against obesity. I remember playing little league - I was the best person on the pitch by a long shot. It was only last weekend actually, I think I have some photos of it if you’re interested (Zach Braff Quotes)

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