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Zach Galifianakis Quotes

My girlfriend and I went to a dinner party the other night and we ended up playing charades. There was another couple there that was deaf. They were so good Picture Quote #1

You know you have a drinking problem when the bartender knows your name -- and you’ve never been to that bar before Picture Quote #1

Element of surprise is really fun for me in comedy. I have to be surprised, and everything’s been done Picture Quote #1

When you look like I do its hard to get a table for one at Chucky Cheese Picture Quote #1

I have a 60-acre farm in North Carolina, and I have a tractor and a farmhouse. As soon as I groom the land, I want to put cabins around and have a place where people can write and hang out. It’ll be either that or an all-black nudist colony Picture Quote #1

I like characters that are fragile and a little bit on the edge Picture Quote #1

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The word abbreviation sure is long for what it means Picture Quote #1

My comfort zone is press conferences Picture Quote #1

On a scale of one to ten, how do I think I look? To certain people I am probably a 1, and then to other people I’m a strong 2 Picture Quote #1

I would start a revolution, but I just bought a hammock Picture Quote #1

American society loves to prop people up and then take them down Picture Quote #1

I call my balls the bush twins Picture Quote #1

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I don’t know what my assistant would do besides get me pot Picture Quote #1

I would have changed my last name if being famous were my goal Picture Quote #1

Tigers love pepper... they hate cinnamon Picture Quote #1

Reciting lines is hard; making stuff up is much, much easier Picture Quote #1

The problem with these interviews is that there’s no sarcastic font Picture Quote #1

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You know it’s time to do the laundry when you dry off with a sneaker Picture Quote #1

Inappropriateness is funny to me. Rudeness is hilarious Picture Quote #1

I have a lot of growing up to do. I realized that the other day inside my fort Picture Quote #1

I once walked in on my grandparents making love... And that’s why I don’t eat raisins Picture Quote #1

People are trying to prove things. And I probably have that. I probably do. Probably guilty of it, in a way Picture Quote #1

At what age do you think it’s appropriate to tell a highway it’s adopted? Picture Quote #1

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I used to be really cute. I could send you earlier photos where I’m stunning. But I’ve gained about twenty pounds over the past two years, and the more weight I’ve put on, the more success I’ve had. If you drew a diagram of weight gain and me getting more work, a mathematician would draw some conclusions from that Picture Quote #1

Fat jokes to me are always, always hilarious, as long as they’re done towards yourself Picture Quote #1

I am not into publicity. I’m not good at it. I get anxiety about it Picture Quote #1

I don’t like cursing in movies. I feel like cursing has become the new hackiness. You try to find substitutions for cursing Picture Quote #1

I just try to keep myself a traditionalist. I liked being an underground comic doing my thing. I want to maintain that. I just do Picture Quote #1

I’m not versed enough in constitutional law to run for office. I’d have to go back to school or something Picture Quote #1

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Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

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Text Quotes

My girlfriend and I went to a dinner party the other night and we ended up playing charades. There was another couple there that was deaf. They were so good. (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) You know you have a drinking problem when the bartender knows your name -- and you’ve never been to that bar before. (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) Element of surprise is really fun for me in comedy. I have to be surprised, and everything’s been done. (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) When you look like I do its hard to get a table for one at Chucky Cheese (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) I have a 60-acre farm in North Carolina, and I have a tractor and a farmhouse. As soon as I groom the land, I want to put cabins around and have a place where people can write and hang out. It’ll be either that or an all-black nudist colony (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) I like characters that are fragile and a little bit on the edge (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) The word abbreviation sure is long for what it means (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) My comfort zone is press conferences (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) On a scale of one to ten, how do I think I look? To certain people I am probably a 1, and then to other people I’m a strong 2 (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) I would start a revolution, but I just bought a hammock (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) American society loves to prop people up and then take them down (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) I call my balls the bush twins (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) I don’t know what my assistant would do besides get me pot (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) My headshot is a scratch and sniff, it smells like failure and onions (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) I would have changed my last name if being famous were my goal (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) Tigers love pepper... they hate cinnamon (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) Reciting lines is hard; making stuff up is much, much easier (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) The problem with these interviews is that there’s no sarcastic font (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) You know it’s time to do the laundry when you dry off with a sneaker (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) Inappropriateness is funny to me. Rudeness is hilarious (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) I have a lot of growing up to do. I realized that the other day inside my fort (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) I once walked in on my grandparents making love... And that’s why I don’t eat raisins (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) People are trying to prove things. And I probably have that. I probably do. Probably guilty of it, in a way (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) At what age do you think it’s appropriate to tell a highway it’s adopted? (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) I used to be really cute. I could send you earlier photos where I’m stunning. But I’ve gained about twenty pounds over the past two years, and the more weight I’ve put on, the more success I’ve had. If you drew a diagram of weight gain and me getting more work, a mathematician would draw some conclusions from that (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) Fat jokes to me are always, always hilarious, as long as they’re done towards yourself (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) I am not into publicity. I’m not good at it. I get anxiety about it (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) I don’t like cursing in movies. I feel like cursing has become the new hackiness. You try to find substitutions for cursing (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) I just try to keep myself a traditionalist. I liked being an underground comic doing my thing. I want to maintain that. I just do (Zach Galifianakis Quotes) I’m not versed enough in constitutional law to run for office. I’d have to go back to school or something (Zach Galifianakis Quotes)

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